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I wish you both the best x
It sounds as though the coke is a symptom of his mental health issues. He needs to be referred by his GP for help with that first before he tries to stop drugs
Hi,
I am sorry you are in this very confusing situation. On the one hand, it is great that his family are involved with him and his recovery, on the other hand, I couldn’t deal with that much interference.
As a person who has children and a whole life with an addict, my biased opinion would be to walk away now whilst it’s just you who has been hurt. Unfortunately it is harder to walk away once you have children with someone. One of the major issues is worrying about the children when they’re with the addict and you’re not there.
I do believe in second chances and that people can change but in your case where you are completely free, I would walk away for your own sanity.
Good luck with whatever you choose to do x
The Blue Widow. It sounds like you need professional counselling to help you deal with all the feelings that are coming up. In some areas you can self-refer, ask your GP or google it.
All I can add is that it is a disease, apparently the person isn’t there anymore. The disease takes over.
I am sorry for your loss physically but the emotional loss probably happened a long time ago. Take care
What are you taking that is causing side effects?
That’s amazing to hear Summer! You’re obviously a very determined person when you want to do something. That’s good advice for others too ????
Well done, that’s excellent news. Keep it up!
Can’t wait to read your positive updates x
I hope you’re ok. You know it’s probably just a blip but blips are painful reminders of what it’s been like in the past. They create worry, uncertainty and anxiety. I know because I’m in a similar situation. My heart is aching today and I feel so sad. I know it will pass with the usual ups and downs but it doesn’t make today an easier.
Hi, that sounds awful. That is a hell of a lot of money to be spending daily, does he work?
Fortunately money hasn’t been affected in my case as he began being addicted to prescription painkillers, he did buy things off the internet for a while which was frustrating but it wasn’t overly expensive.
Have you thought about leaving so that you and your children can feel secure?
Thanks for replying and I’m glad it helps you feel less alone. After suffering with acute stress, I’ve come to the conclusion that there’s nothing I can do for him personally but only look after myself and the children, we are not here to look after people who won’t take care of themselves.
When he makes positive steps I encourage him and help him get to meetings or whatever I can do in a practical sense. He is hopefully going to do a detox in summer so I have been to a funding meeting for that with him but I can’t do anymore than that, he has to do the rest.
I don’t know about couples counselling because, as you say, it’s only half the person there when drugs are involved so it might be a waste of time? It’s the connection that I miss.
Unfortunately the drugs will always come first before us and I don’t know how long people can deal with that for. If you need personal support or help then google Icarus. Also, you could encourage him to go to his local drugs and alcohol service.
Take care x
Hi, I have heard that addicts often replace one addiction with others. They just replace an addiction to one thing with something else. I have found this to be true with my partner
Also, I’ve now told some close friends and some family for my own sanity, he sees this as a betrayal and is mad at me. I couldn’t stand being on my own with it anymore.
I feel as though I’m not on my own physically but mentally I am
What a sad situation for you. I suppose you’ve got two choices, he could get support from a local service and attend meetings etc.. with your support or you could leave and live a happy life for yourself without a selfish addiction dragging you down and making you unhappy.
I live with my partner who has a methadone script and it’s hard (even though he hasn’t relapsed) it’s taken a while and lots of ups and downs to get to this point. we have children and that is what stops me leaving. I do love him and want him to get better but it’s made me mentally and physically ill living with an addict so I’ve had to distance myself.
Could you consider either option?
My only practical advice would be to smoke it slightly less than you are now, reducing your use bit by bit. So if you smoke it every day, try every other day to begin with for example
Hi, it sounds like you need some extra support with this. I can imagine it’s very difficult to stop but it does need to be you and your own motivation and determination to stop, not someone forcing you or you’ll just smoke it secretly or start up again.
Having a baby may stop someone temporarily but it is definitely not the answer. People still take drugs whilst pregnant due to addiction and parenting is hard enough without trying to do it with an addiction to weed.
Could you speak to your GP or ring FRANK? Use google to see where you can get help. Good luck