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I’ve been thinking about you all day. I tried to reply to you earlier but I feel so choked for your loss I could find no words of comfort to offer you. I can’t begin to imagine how unbearable your pain must be right now.

How do you get the through this? Honestly, I’ve no idea. I guess you just get up each day and hope your pain will lessen by the tiniest amount. Allow those who love you to be your strength, don’t worry about being angry, be however you need to be.

Please don’t be too hard on yourself, your pain is great enough without self blame. Take one day at a time, one hour at a time if need be. Know that others do care that you are hurting… even those you have never met. Deb xxx

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I am so so sorry :'( xxxxxxx

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Hi Chris, I’ve read your post a few times now and have been staring at a blank text box not knowing what or how to respond. I am certainly not in a position to give any advice. But for what it’s worth I feel for you and your dilemma. I have total admiration for the fact that you have done as much as you already have for your ‘stepson’ when you are no longer even with his mother. What a wonderful father you are. Your stepson is so incredibly lucky to have you. It’s early days for me, I’m still of the mindset of desperately wanting and trying to change my sons behaviour. All in vain maybe but I’m still trying to make sense of everything and accept what’s happening. So, right now for me the idea of giving up and walking away (whilst in my thoughts) in reality is not an option. I’m just not strong enough and see my son as being too vulnerable. I’m afraid if I push him away and if he gives up because of that that I would be totally responsible and consumed with guilt. I’m sorry Chris that I cannot offer you any wise words of advice but I wanted you to at least know that I’m thinking of you x

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You are both so lovely. Thank you for taking the time to read my post and reply. Both your replies made me cry. I have no-one to talk to so your words of support and encouragement touched my heart. It just hurts so much :'( I don’t feel strong enough to deal with this. I would rather fall asleep and not wake up than watch him do this to himself :'(
I will try to find my way round this site and read your stories, but another night I think, when I’m not feeling quite so fragile. Because everything is so raw at the moment that I’m crying for all of us :'(
Thank you for caring enough to respond, I really appreciate it xx

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