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Hi sweetpea
I have just written a really long message and I pressed cancel by mistake..anyway this is a positive start for him to get involved and realise how much it is affecting the relationship.. Good luck with the counselling I am routing for you both and thanks for your support aswell
Oh yes yours definitely sounds familiar and no they dont see that do they. Thanks for that I wont ever recover but time is definitely a good healer.its been 8 years since I lost him so I am back to myself again but will never be who I used to be..I celebrate his bday every year and keep him with me that way and we always talk about him. It’s not even my husbands baby but always talks about him like he is…. I’m staying out next wkend and at the end of the month for a few weekends so hopefully he will see that I mean buisness.
My husband drinks the devil Stella then goes on to vodka. Hes not overweight at all hes physically fit but his liver cant be.it will soon creep up on him..I’m not saying I am innocent I used to do benders and drink a full bottle of jd in a night but this was due to my trauma I had a stillborn baby boy. And he had a trauma and had a bad car accident and killed his gf and so that his we got together…he did actually bring me back to life and live again.but whilst I am healing and not drinking like that anymore and becoming myself again.he is still where he is when I met him. If that makes sense? I wont just give up on him cause he didn’t with me. My next step is to start doing my own thing on Fridays and possibly staying out whether that’s at s friends or a hotel …. how long have you been together?
Yes I definitely know how you feel if I could just get a good night sleep on a Friday that would be amazing.i dont need to go into the spare room because he wont even go to bed but I can hear him being loud and putting music on. It pisses me right off. Our house is open plan so o cant even block him out. Hes woken up this morning like nothing has happened. Hes just selfishly ruined my weekend.ive told him it needs to stop and hes like yes ok. But nothing changes. I almost always retaliate…I’m shouting at the top of my voice and luckily no neighbours have moved in next door.but they soon will be and this needs to stop. I hate him at weekends the only thing I could do to open his eyes is move out but I’ve nowhere to go. Hes woken up all nice asking if I want breakfast and hes going to clean the house.hes just told me sorry blah blah like that means anything. I will see if he sticks to his words next week I very much doubt it. It would be great if I could have a weekend pad somewhere and just be with him during the week…
Hi Sweetpea
Thanks for your response.I was thinking the same thing that it’s all part of being controlling because the one thing he doesnt and cant control is the money.all of his money goes in my bank as he doesn’t have one so I do all the finances. Do you get some kind of abuse? Last night I finally got a good night sleep since friday I’ve only had 4 hours due to his pathetic antics. Now he would have sobered up when he wakes up I’m going to be telling him what he was like again but it’s like a broken record.ive told him over and over.ive even videod him when hes drunk and he just laughs at it. To survive this relationship I need to start doing my own things on a Friday.i was even contemplating booking a hotel just so I can get s good night sleep.but then he could acuse me of cheating or something… did you have to pay for a counsellor?
Hi Claire
Thanks for sharing this with us. Can I ask do you have a morgage together? Do you feel like you are trapped and have no where else to go?
I am now at the end of my tether now and thought I would share my story as it is so hard hiding what our relationship is really like inside the home, and you dont want your family to know. I have been married to my husband for 3 years now and got together 7 years ago. I met him in a pub as I was a barmaid. We both like to drink at weekends, but my husband doesnt know when to stop and he will regularly do benders most weekends. He can not do a Friday without a drink. I would go to bed and he would blast the music up and start shouting and
Bauling talking to himself. He doesnt shut up.hes laughing loud then crying. This has been happening for a long as I can remember but like you, I didn’t see at first. I’m either getting wiser to it or just had enough. But either way this has to stop. There is so much more to tell but at the end of the day I’ve had enough of his shit. In my case I have a morgage and have nowhere else to go. Hes the money earner and without him I would struggle so much. And to clarify Monday to Thursday he is a loving caring guy who works hard and helps around the house. He is s totally different person at weekends…he is cocky, selfish,aggressive, loud,doesnt give a shit attitude and thinks hes invincible.the one thing he doesnt do is call me names or hit me but he has grabbed my wrists which leave bruise Marks. I really don’t know what to do next but sharing our issues we could help each other . Are you planning on leaving your boyfriend? The fact we are in denial is they will never change.we either live with it or do something about it. I am 37 and my husband is 45 can I ask how old you and your boyfriend is ? ….