[worriedpartner]

I too have been with my ‘fiancé’ for 13 years and have two children together. We were meant to be married last April but due to covid this was cancelled and rearranged for April next year…this is now cancelled, we are still together but no longer engaged. I have been very secretive about our situation to family and friends but some now know a little bit of what’s going on but still not the whole picture but the things they do know are not approved of at all and they now have a negative view on him whereas everyone loved him before. He got in with a new friend around a year ago and after being someone who rarely drank, this is now their thing that they do everytime they’re together, which is several times a week. He too now drink drives. There are bottles and cans all over the car constantly and about 6 months ago his friend introduced him to cocaine and now that, along with the alcohol is taking over. He regrets it the next day and says never again, but once the comedown wares off it just continues in a cycle. Last night was his worst binge yet. I’ve said I think his new friendship is ruining him but hey, what do I know. We haven’t tried proper councelling yet as money flow doesn’t allow, but after going round and round in circles having the same conversations over and over with no change, I’ve bought a few books to try and help us communicate more effectively. I feel like I’m putting up barriers and just feel so much anger and resentment towards him and that’s not helping anyone. I don’t want to walk away, I want to help him and want him back to the person he has been for the past 12 years and not this crazy wild man child he has turned into. Im sorry I have no words if wisdom or advice but wanted you to know I understand and can empathise with you xx you are not alone xx

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