Hi Tigerbabby, I’m so sorry to hear your story and wish I had a magic wand! I am a mother of a 23 year old addict and can truly empathise with you, I’m afraid I have lost that trust too in my son. I think you have done amazingly well as it’s the hardest thing watching someone destroy themselves and their family with seemingly no regard for anything but themselves and their addiction. I phoned a helpline yesterday and they said that an addict is only really in love with their drug of choice and whilst they may care about you deep down they can’t really for relationships. Sorry you have no one to talk to, I don’t really talk to anyone about it, there’s such a stigma isn’t there?
It sounds like you have made your decision and i personally think that feeling angry is a positive step. You don’t deserve this and you have to look after you and your son x