Hello,
So last night was a better evening, my son ate with us and washed-up, and even let the dog sleep in his room, which hasn’t happened for a few weeks. Its early days though and I have been here before a good few times.
Bump22: I started looking at forums aimed at users because I was completely out of my depth and very low on empathy. I thought I was going mad last week, I confiscated some pills that seemed to be having a psychotic effect and nearly downed the lot myself 🙂 I have looked at Opiate Recovery which is a subreddit on Reddit. I know about this because my son has talked about them checking in with each other as they mark their days clean. You will find posts on there that will make your toes curl, but in amongst it are amazing people that have really gone through the mill with this, supporting and advising each other. I think that empathy is a really hard thing to hold on to in all of this, but on Sunday night my son had news that a friend of his (not a user) had committed suicide. This was someone who had been lovely to my son in the past and encouraged him to fight his addiction. We just sat on his bed, his head on my shoulder, and that opened up better conversations and I felt brought him back to me, but it is maintaining it that’s hard. Sorry I’m rambling.
I think these forums are good places to ask questions, just ignore any silly responses and take on board any insights that are useful. Because of the painkiller epidemic in America, there are a lot of regular people with opiate addiction issues, and they have ended up there via the doctors prescription pad and greedy drug companies, not through the recreational drugs culture.
Jenny – I really hope that you were able to sleep last night undisturbed and that your son is somewhere safe. I really hope that he finds a permanent place soon. A good nights sleep becomes such a rare thing. I put audible books on at night with headphones, I listen to travel writers, things like The Salt Path, where your brain doesn’t get pulled into a plot, and the narration is gentle. Its helped me a lot.