I feel like that too .mourning for my old son..my living room is adorned with photos of happier times when he was younger..it feels surreal where we are with him now.
Sometimes it’s like this whole covid thing I just cant get my head round how life has changed.
Try if you can to put it to the back of your mind if tph possibly can and enjoy the weekend.
Go for a nice walk with your husband take in the lovely colours of the autumn trees…sorry if that sounds corny but when I’m feeling low and desperate I try to appreciate those things.
Xxx