Thank you so much for your response, I’m so sorry that you too have to endure such heartbreak! Yes the name calling is particularly hard – And I agree they don’t set out to be addicts! That’s even more heartbreaking and that’s when the guilt comes in. My son, I’m sure has an anxiety disorder and he has self medicated since he was 15 with various substances and behaviours. I have always tried to love him through setbacks but so much is at risk this time. Our week end was ruined along with my younger son’s and his family as we were called to a dispute at their home after they had just arrived at ours for our first after visit lockdown! Sending you strength. I have never been able to cut all ties as I believed there is always hope – now I am doubting myself – I know I would not have him home if he allows his marriage to fail. I will just be eaten up with what could have been, I’m sure you know what I mean – I want to love him but I don’t know how to without taking on all the chaos – if that makes sense. I can’t even cry anymore – I just shut down and hide under the duvet for days at a time. Lock down has been a saviour for me in not having to face my work colleagues and friends xx
