Hi All
Apologies not been on here for a while.
Kate1 – my belated condolences to you and your family.
My situation is no different.
My son has a new girlfriend ( a rebound I feel). She comes from a nice family; not sure what they will think when they find out he’s addicted to weed. She knows all about him and has witnessed a few altercations with us.
I had to message her on social media to explain, the way we treat him hasn’t just happened it’s been 5 long years of behaviour.
His routine is –
Work at local express supermarket chain 3pm-11pm; meet friends park up, smoke weed, drive home stoned (gets in 1am or 2am)
Gets up after lunch – repeat or goes out to whoever is around and smokes. The will see his girlfriend. leaves hers or she leaves here t 11pm. Then he meets his friends and smokes, back early hours.
We have said it’s disrespectful to come back waking us up when we have work the next day. Also, irresponsible smoking while stoned.
He sees no wrong – we are the ones who are not taking his lifestyle into consideration.
He’s in debt, recently cleared his savings account to pay off his overdraft and is overdrawn again – repeat!
He has no car, his gearbox is knackered (2nd one now) and somehow his drivers window got smashed saturday night at midnight ( he called us to tell us what had happened; after messaging us the week before telling us he doesn’t need us)
His girlfriend witnessed him talking to us like dirt. He wanted her to sleep at ours, we said they haven’t been together that long and when he starts to tow the line she can.
She arrived at ours at 10.30pm; he got onto her car and they drove off. came back 10 minutes later. We’d already said she couldn’t sleep.
I’d locked the front door and put the key in the lock. I opened the door and I said that she couldn’t sleep. He went ballistic. My husband came downstairs and told him we had pre warned him. He said we were putting his relationship at risk. She walked off to her car. He followed and stayed at hers.
As he left he said I wish you two would drop dead and die a painful death.
I messaged his girlfriend the next day to apologise and to tell her it wasn’t aimed at her – I also told her what he said to us.
She never replies.
We had an almighty row last Sunday. He went to a theme park with his girlfriend (we have said it’s great to do nice things but get out of debt first; he told us if he doesn’t do things with her it will jeopardies his relationship).
My husband text him and said if you don’t come home at a decent time i’m going to put the key in the door. Which he did.
She dropped him home at 10.30pm and he got straight in his friends car, he rolled in at 1am – my husband and he had a massive row, my husband told him he should move out and a few more choice words.
Our son then broke down in tears. My husband went downstairs to find him sat in the kitchen with boxes of paracetamol and ibuprofen.
My husband has blamed me for not having a good relationship with him – I said I’ve seen this before whereby he’s sobbed told me he wants to stop and the following day brought £110 worth of weed.
My husband now feels sorry for him and says we should try and help him more.
So…..
It’s now Wednesday 12.32pm – he’s still in bed, due in work at 3pm. I drop him and no doubt his friend will pick him up.
Monday he was out until 1am, I dropped him at work and his friend picked him up from work at 11pm.
Last night his girlfriend came round they sat in his room, she left at 11pm. he walked her up the drive and then jumped into his friends car and came home at 1am.
My husband cannot see he’s just walking all over us.
Slowly going insane…………….