Well yesterday he sent me two very long messages a few minutes before I was due to start work. Perfect timing.
The first saying that his therapist was prepared to talk to me and that he would also be getting a legal certificate to say he’s clean. He is definitely not! and hasn’t been and how can she justify that when she’s never even met him. How can all these people believe all this stuff?
The second message was to tell me that I am derisory and manipulating and constantly cause him to relapse – so why is he living here?
Anyway, looks like the penny has dropped and he is going to stay with his girlfriend until he starts his MA. I hope if I am the cause he can really get clean – and then I will start to take a really hard look at myself.
All he did really was lay the blame at my feet and tell me the addiction is a symptom of our relationship. And all I’ve ever done is want the best for him, so I have to give up because it could be years before he matures enough to see what I have had to endure in my childhood/adulthood and as a wife/partner.
I just sent a text telling him I love him and will work on myself too. Otherwise this will constantly escalate into arguments and relapse.
Could I ask you lovely ladies one question – he told me I could ring his therapist and she would be happy to talk to me about the CBT he has been having. I don’t really want to – but what do you think? I’m worried I’ll say all the wrong things and in general I think it’s slightly immoral talking to someones therapist. But I will have to give him a reason…