Bump- I understand where you are coming from. It isn’t fair to the rest of the my family either. That’s also been pointed out to me and I’m really thinking about it lately. It isn’t fair to my daughters, my husband, my sister, that my son’s problems consume me, that he gets all my mental attention and my health suffers and then they all have less of a person in me. I don’t quite know how to fix that, but I sure want to try. I want to try and figure out why I take his meanness just because I’m his mom, and a mother never gives up even if she gets destroyed?? Something is not right there.
It seems unfair that the person who is causing all the problems and at this point, won’t change is getting all the love and attention. My son won’t go to rehab or AA or counselors or mentors or anything that would actually make him face his problems. He just takes, gives no time or caring to anyone in the family- including his nieces and nephews, and is unkind and takes it out on me which I can only assume is because I’m the mom and am the nicest to him. Unfair. That’s why I have to take a break from him for a while. All I do is spin my wheels and exhaust myself trying to think of ways that will make him stop drinking and nothing works and I just need to face that. It’s on him.