It really is a awful situation for everyone involved.
I think for me just trying to find some peace in it all has been hard. The hardest bit is how my younger sons friendships have been affected.
I am in half term a time when my youngest shld be having lots of play dates but we have been ostracized by the mums and as a result my son is being left out.
I made a mistake in a..moment of weakness in confiding ro a mum who I thought was a friend but how wrong i was…the judgy mums at the school gates are something else.
Its heart breaking that his older brothers issues has impacted him so much even though we kicked our oldest out and my young son has no idea about his addiction as we protected him from it all.
As for my eldest hes been clean for 3 mnths and has moved this week from the rehab I got him into and now in a dry house.
Obviously I am pleased hes clean at present but he still has no respect for us and I’m sick of how he speaks to me ..blocks my calls is rude and confrontational unless he needs help with .money or something.
I’m not going to lie I dont like my son. How hes affected us all and how he still treats us even when clean is so appalling that I cant bear to be in his company as I feel bullied by him.
I know he resents me for kicking him out but I dont have any regrets.
I protected the rest of us and also feel it pushed him to rock bottom.
He doesnt appreciate the days of hunting around to get him that rehab..he just sees it as me his mum abandoning him.
I hate saying this but maybe others feel the same but with or without drugs my son is selfish.
Hes only once ever bought me a present or card same as his stepdad and everything in life is all about him.
I dont know maybe that’s just my son and the rest of ypurs are lovely personality without the drugs.
Everyone in here imo deserves to put themselves first.
We can assist our addicts in other ways like giving them information to access help but spend that mnths rent they havnt paid on yourself or your other kids or grandchildren where it is money better spent.
A guy who gave a talk I went to said and who ran a rehab said take away all u do to enable them that’s the best you can do.
I know that alot of their issues is rooted in mental health and I’ve even given my son access to help but he wldnt engage..ypu can lead a horse…..
I know that I am fortunat that at present my son is clean and I know when he wasnt how I wld have given anything to get to that place but now.im here I still feel the weight of another relapse hanging over me and feel so low about how I’ve had to live the last 8 yrs. The consequences are far reaching ..my mental health my husband and now even my younger sons.
I shldnt have had to been through and seen the things I have. I’m a good law abiding person and my life was never like this.
Anyway sorry for putting this all down on this forum sometimes it helps to put your feelings in writing.
Hang on in there ladies and do what you can to live a happy life.