Don’t feel shameful Pambler- it’s not a productive emotion. I’m fairly certain you never thought you would become addicted. Yes, addiction takes over, but you’re still in there and you must fight. I don’t know how long you’ve been sober, but I know that when my son gets sober, the shame and guilt are huge. You must put your energy in to positive things and getting better, not on beating yourself up.
I think it was Penny that said it best, remorse and sorry are actions. When you have those guilt feelings, channel those back in to your recovery and do something healthy for you.
Keep hanging in there..