Hi Mamma4 your story sounds so like mine and a lot of peoples on this group. I’m still working my way through this and this forum has been a god send, it’s so good to just not feel alone and like the most terrible person in the world. I have tried withdrawing a few times cold turkey and I too have kids and have just never managed past 4 ish days. I also tried tapering but never had the discipline needed until this time because I knew I wanted it. I told my family because I knew I needed someone else to keep me on the straight and narrow so to speak, so if your lucky enough to have someone you can trust to help you with your taper that can be such a good help on those harder days. I tapered really quickly the first week or so and now I’m slowing down because I’m not taking much now compared to what I was having. Also tapering the dosage helps, I went from multiple times a day to taking 2 doses a day. But I’ve learnt from this forum that everyone is different and you have to do it however you can. I’ve found pushing myself to do things depending on my mood really helps. If I feel rage I clean like I’m a woman possessed. If I feel down a walk in the woods or a long the beach helps. Do what you need to do to get through it and take it hour by hour and forgive yourself when you eff up excuse the French. We all make mistakes, we are human and one mistake doesn’t mean the whole game is over, I just keep trying to plug away. I find the Breethe app listening to sleep stories and meditations helps me personally, again though I think it’s finding something that helps your mood to lift and we are all so different. I’ve been taking vitamins including magnesium tablets. Also trying to quit alcohol as I find that’s a trigger for me too. It’s not easy but we can do it because as someone else told me on here, we are warriors!!! We can do anything. Wishing you every success and we are all in this together xxx
