Hi Lozzy
I really feel for you.
the upset their addiction causes they will never understand. Maybe one day if they get clean.
you should join co anon, for families of cocaine and other kind altering substances. they have zoom meetings on 5 times a week, u can get yourself a sponsor, make new friends who you can reach out to and work the 12 steps to re gain some sanity and clarity.
I’ve been in the meetings 3 weeks and already feel so much calmer and clearer. And most of all not alone anymore.
Xxxx