[lilgunner]

Can anyone share their experience. I feel like a idiot.

[debc]

Hi LilGunner,

Welcome to the Forum.

I am the Mum of an addict, alcohol and cocaine, he is doing well at the moment, but it has been a very long and distressing road, the only way I can describe it is, it is like living in hell.

Cocaine is an evil drug and completely changes people, they lie, manipulate, do anything to get money, and hurt the people that help them the most.

They will only ever give up when they want to, no matter what anybody says to them.

I can’t tell you what to do, and wouldn’t dream of it, but if you read other stories on here you will see the devastation it brings to families, people in relationships.

It is an illness, and it’s very sad to see, but they are the ones who have to want to give up and seek help, you only hope one day that they do.

Take care of yourself first and think what you want to do. Keep in touch on here, lots of great advice from people in similar situations.

Dx

[lilgunner]

Hi Debc,

Thanks for your response, it means so much.

I have been reading lots of people’s experiences on this site and for ages it feels like I am going out of my mind.

I understand that if he wants to stop it must come from within. He has said so many times he wants to stop, I’ve even had the psychotic phone call where he’s crying, in pain begging for help, but then by the end of the week he does it again.

Nothing as happened between us, which I know I am in a better position than most people, but it’s the constant worry. I suppose in some ways when I know he’s on one atleast I can keep a friendly watch over him, knowing if or not he wakes up.

I just feel so stupid, like why am I even bothering. Suppose it’s just who I am, I hate the thoughts of anyone struggling. I really hope he gets the help one day, and maybe that’s what I am hoping for, that message of how he’s been clean and not used in a few months and on the road to recovery.

Addition is bloody horrible, a wicked disease. I’ve lost my Dad, Grandad, 2 uncles and more recently my Niece’s Mum. It’s torture as I know the eventual outcome and I really don’t want to hear of another person in close proximity losing their battle to addition.

X

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