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By sounds your not to far in to stop, while it’s habit and you already hate it that’s good sign, I do it’s shit ruins life’s I used to use same as you then one night woke up on bathroom floor I’d got up to go the loo don’t know if I passed out or had a fit scared me to death I stopped then I lapsed 1 night but didn’t enjoy it. Stay strong see your dr about anxiety be honest with them good luck
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