[frankie]

Sorry is such an easy word but it’s worn out in our home. Tears don’t make a difference. How many promises to give up, reduce or get help.

My husband is an addict. Coke & alcohol. He manages to function for work. But lives like a vampire after binges. He even has a fridge next to our bed.

I’ve tried different ways to help him but he never sticks to counselling. To be honest I’m frozen, so sad but can’t cry anymore. I can’t continue with a lonely life. I’m lucky I fill it in many ways but my parents are sick and elderly. I’m tired, trying to cope but neglecting myself and losing my husband.

I hate the drugs, he has regular nose bleeds and looks terrible. But I’m nagging.

Had another argument over it all tonight … final decision not to talk for a week.

When I read threads on here I now properly understand peoples pain. I think I was naive before. Thought I could change him & cope. It’s a long journey and it takes effort on everyone’s part. I don’t think he has it in him he would prefer to split up. We have both agreed we have had enough. So sad he was my best friend. I just don’t know him anymore & he says the same of me.

[navy]

Hello frankie

I feel your pain, I totally understand the amount of times they say sorry, but it’s just a word with no meaning from them as they are not sorry but sorry they have been caught out.

I am on my third attempt to get him to stop, he says he needs a holiday to reset so we are going away soon but I found the stuff yesterday on the unit. I broke my heart, I thought he had given up as he now has a hole in his nose (so much use) he also has constant nose bleeds, upset stomach, he can’t breath properly and it has frightened him so I thought ok he will give it up now, but no just complained he has a sore nose and it’s been a stressful day so needs to be on his own ( he just doesn’t want to be with me as he is on it).

I’m going to go away and see how it goes. I’m going to pray and hope that this is what he needs and it’s not just a faze and he will be back on it when home.

I’m so sorry that it has come to a head for you, I understand what say about not knowing them anymore I feel the same it’s like living with a stranger, we don’t talk anymore, it’s mostly by text. I do hope that when/if you leave that he realises what he has lost and this gives him a kick up the arse (wake up call) for him.

Sending lots of love and keep looking After yourself. Remember this is not your fault and it’s not up to you to fix him.

Take care

Navy xx

[Author]

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