Cocaine

Hello all. I’m just here to reach out because I have a problem. My cocaine use has put a hole in my septum that I push my coke boogers through with my finger and I will need reconstructive surgery soon. I’ve been trying to kick the habit for about a year now. I’ve been using for 8 years constant, I only use once a week but that’s only because my budget doesn’t allow for more. I’m glad I haven’t jusmped off the deep end and I always have my finances in order before I use. I tip I’ve been hearing to stop usage is to identify my triggers and I think I have. So, whenever I game on my PC once a week is when I use along with a case of beer. I usually consume 2-3 grams during that 12-18 hr period along with 12-18 beers. My hold up is that I don’t want to quit gaming but it calls to me every time I game and when I don’t have it while gaming my time seems tiring and boring. I’m at a loss for solutions … Do I just quit gaming and see of that does it? Because I don’t crave cocaine any other time. Gaming used to be how I destress and escape from life in general. I feel like getting rid of that trigger seems super depressing. I do hold a lot of mental baggage as well caused by an abundance of trauma in my childhood teens and early adulthood but have gone through at least 10 therapists which all seemed to not actually help work through my trauma but instead just go straight to trying to give me pills. As stupid as it might sound I do not want to be on medication that completely changes my brain chemistry… I know right… I’ll use cocaine but I won’t take pills…. I’m just at a loss for thought about the whole situation.