[rebecca]

My husband has used cocaine for 20years, I only
Became aware 9years ago. Since then I’ve forgiven
Him over and over again. I’ve found round the house in the car, it’s been happening at my works Xmas do I caught him. He’s promised to stop
But I always catch him out then he has to admit it.
He believes it’s ok and everyone does it. We split just over a year ago
Got back together he went to docs was going to get
Referred to a rehab programme. This never happened he said he never received the letter from the clinic. He says he’s come off cocaine on his own and doesn’t need help. But there has been occaisions where I am sure he’s back on it but he denies it and I’m left feeling it’s me. I’ve been to coucilling and put on antidepressants as he says I’m the one who can’t let it go. I just can’t believe he’s off coke after 20years and I know what I see. He’s of a very addictive nature when he goes out for a drink it’s always to excess, making me anxious in his company. I love him but I don’t like him sometimes.
I’m just so confused he’s agreed to go to marriage coucilling but he feels that won’t sort out anything but he’ll go for me if it’s what I want. Can someone please give me some clarity. He gets up goes to work pays bills and I know he loves me very much but I’ve lost my trust in him.

[rebecca]

Today he’s bought me flowers and I’m too scared to be nice as I know he’ll go back to his ways.
And hurt me, the disappointment I feel is awful, I just want a quiet life for him to admit to himself and me and get help!!!

[Author]

Posts