Hi Evie,
I’m sorry to read your post and see how difficult it has been for you to manage with your boyfriend’s addictions. If you would like some help for yourself please contact us at Icarus Trust. We are a charity that supports people dealing with addiction in their life, like yourself. we have trained and experienced family Friends who you could talk with and maybe that would help you answer some of your questions.
You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrust.org
Best wishes to you.