[unknown24]

Ok there’s a lot of back story but just going to get down to the nitty gritty. (Ex) boyfriend of 7 years has a meth addiction. Been going on solidly for the last 5 yrs. he has 2 teenage (14 and 15) children from previous relationship. We have been raising the kids for over 5 years joint custody with mother with the last 2 years full time for us. Other than the actual addiction he was fine as a boyfriend for several years. Has a lot of self hate. He decided he wanted to get sober last year (his own decision) after panic attacks and feeling bad and having his kids full time wanting to be there for them. It lasted maybe 4 months (I don’t really know for sure how long bc he hid that he started using again from me for several months).

TheE kids have been in my life all 7 years and I love them to death and they love me. After he got clean then relapsed things went downhill for us, he lied, hid things from me like selling drugs spending time with ppl etc. would leave for days. Anyways he broke up with me. He says he’s no good for me and I think he regrets it but it is what it is and I’m trying hard to get over it.

But… he left and is staying at a friends or in a car or idk and all his stuff is still here and HIS CHILDREN are here and I’m raising them. Been the sole provider and watcher of them for the last year as he came in and out of our lives when he so chose.

Now he’s basically doing the same, he texts his kids every day and it’s been about 6 weeks he’s seen them more in the last 2 weeks than before, twice or so a week. I know that being his support system is enabling him to not get help and not want to get sober or take responsibility, he loves his kids very much and wants them in his life and says he doesn’t know what to do. When I bring up sobriety he ignores it, he’s in denial.

I can’t kick them to the curb. There’s no other family for them to go to right now and they need me and love me snd I don’t know what to do. I want to take care of them. How do I support them and not enable him? I fear there’s no good answer, I’ve been on Reddit to get answers about how to deal with heartbreak but I can’t talk about his addiction with people who haven’t been through that. Does anyone have anything to help? This is so hard. Thanks for reading if you took the time it was a lot sorry.

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