Spotty dog thank you so much for your reply which I have only just seen searching for Adfam email to login. I guess writing it down somehow seems to help me and as my partner is having yet another episode I’m reaching out again, I feel so rude I haven’t replied to you after your kind words. Every time I need him to support me he drinks. I found out yesterday that my ex husband has kidney cancer at aged 41, I have 3 young daughters by him and my partner upon hearing the news started drinking. I feel devastated about my ex, he is such a wonderful man and father and he doesn’t deserve what he is going through. My partner is drunk in bed at the moment asleep and has been for hours and after yesterday’s news I actually don’t feel anything regarding him, not even anger or disappointment. I just feel so sad for my ex and my girls who don’t even know about their dad yet. I cried all night last night, my eyes are still swollen now. Addicts are so selfish it’s beyond comprehension to me. I am so sorry you also have to cope with an alcoholic, I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone. I feel like a little piece of me dies with every episode, we are supposed to marry on 12th December, the wedding has been cancelled twice due to COVID and I wonder also if it’s life’s way of doing me a favour by preventing it from happening. Truth is though that when he’s sober and working hard and being the best man he can be I’ve never been so in love. How has the sober drive gone with your husband? I hope he is continuing with it and you have peace at the moment. Sending you hugs and if you’d like to talk I’d love that and will make sure I check my mail this time xx
