[kym]

Hi I’m new to this site and yesterday I left my home and my husband

he has always been a drinker but he has changed no longer cares if I am on my on every weekend it’s the same he gets up at 7am on Saturday has breakfast walks the dog then at 11am of he goes  to a pub stays three hours then drives to the next one and  stays until he is paralytic he walks home we’ll staggers then it’s every ten mins on toilet and banging and crashing around eventually falls asleep with his tv on loud all night as he says he can’t sleep without background noise     Then Sunday he is up at 8am breakfast dog then back to pub at 11am until he decides to come home

I stopped making Sunday dinner as I found he couldn’t even eat it he was so drunk

and he has some sort of issue where he regurgitated mouthful of food constantly and has to vomit I believe this to be alcohol related he disagrees

I have tried talking nicely

I have tried explaining we can’t afford

i have cried begged and all I get is criticised he tells me I have to much time on my hands even though I work he has smashed items in my home but never ever hurt me physically

he has caused trouble at my grown up daughters house with her neighbour

he just doesn’t see the devastation he causes and doesn’t seem to care anyway

i love this man so much he was once a kind man and I felt loved now I feel so hurt so let down  I have left and have moved in with my father

 

my husband has not rung me to see if I ok or anything

i cant eat sleep or get thoughts out of my head about what he is up to as I type

properly still at a bar  why do I hurt so much when it’s him who has the problem

I am going to go to Alanon but really it should be him as he has the disease not me he just laughs in my face

his friends call him to go out and even if we had made plans to stay in if he would go ignoring my pleas

he says he loves me and hugged me before I drove away mi feel so lost

anyone else in this situation

 

 

[careaboutyou]

Dear Kym,

Very sorry for you as I know what it’s like living with an alcoholic, as I did with my late husband.

You have done the right thing, you have moved out and you have to think of yourself. Although he has never hurt you, he has still smashed things in your home and this drinking to excess is going to only get progressively worse. I suspect that you’re not telling the full horror of the situation and it’s no way to live. If you are worried about him looking after himself, he is not a child, he’s an adult and you cannot be a carer. Take care of yourself, before he destroys you.

I’m sure that you love him as I loved my late husband, but nothing is going to change……….It sounds like you don’t have children together, so that’s a relief. Leave him to his sorry ways, I’m sure that your Daughter will be relieved that you’ve had the strength to see it for what it is and leave him.

I’m routing for you, that’s for you….your innocent life, not his. Don’t go back! xxx

 

 

 

 

[Lozzy80]

Kym

You have made a brave step moving out.  In the early days this might shock him into changing his ways but be warned it may only be brief to win you back . Don’t let any guilt or shame factor creep in …you sound strong….you can love the old him and let him go….they are no longer there

 

Hoping to find my own strength soon to leave and start living again.

Hope you are ok , couple of days now since your post and I know how much can happen in just 48 hours…  Be prepared for a roller coaster of emotions and turmoil  but re-read what you have written here  , or in any journal …. Hopefully it keeps you staying strong…also have your mind set on a goal for you – what do you want to achieve in the next few weeks, 6 months , 1 year…stay focused on these goals and don’t look back xx

[FrazzlePop24]

Well done!

My brother has RUINED our family and I wish I could move us all away from him and his scummy behaviour.

Stay strong, you’ve done the right thing.

[Author]

Posts