Is he addicted or not???

Welshgirl2024

1 replies

Is he addicted or not???

Hi, my partner is a cocaine user, he says he is addicted and needs it therfore cannot help using or spending money on it. My issue with it though is that when I think of adduction, I think of someone who wakes up everyday needing the drug. Who will spend every penny they have on it. My partner can go days in between. He only buys when it’s payday for himself which he will buy 3 for 100 which is monthly pay. Then if he can borrow off me when I get paid as I’m weekly pay then he will buy 1 bag. On the days where I won’t lend him or he had no money he won’t do drugs and is completely normal. If he was addicted surely he would be climbing walls looking for it?

Yes if he has his own money he will always buy a bag and then give me the rest of his money ad a way to keep me happy. If I lend him money then it’s always only for 1 bag and he is happy with that. I’ve seen him go 2 weeks a time without any and he can all week on a regular basis with only using on weekends. He doesn’t party he stays in the house when he takes in and goes to bed as normal, maybe has 4 cans on Friday.

He says he’s been using cocaine for nearly 20 years but I’m having a problem believing he is truly addicted. I think he likes taking it and is selfish when it comes to him being able to buy it. He holds a job down. Gives me money for bills etc and leads a normal life. He doesn’t scream addicted to me. I honestly think he is just using as he likes it and when he has money he will buy it. When I think of addiction I think of lying cheating and stealing to get it. Everyday use.

I have been with this man 2 and half years and we have a 7 month old togther and I have a teenager from a previous relationship. I need to know what I’m dealing with and if this is truly an addiction or not.

Im trying to consider what is best for me and my kids. If it is a full blown addiction then I know leaving is best. But if he is making out he is addicted so I will allow him to use when he wants then I’m thinking there is hope there.

Please no judging I. Just looking for advice.

 

 

 

  • thistim3
    Participant

    My experience is that he used coke causally for several years when it was available.  He probably was not buying it for himself during this time, but would join in with other coworkers who were using and not thinking much of it during these random moments  Then after increased and more frequent free sessions, he became overwhelmed with it.  He never told me any of this.  Just my observations of him, and remembering how he was.  Then his behavior changed drastically – literally overnight.  A real life horror story.  It still scares me all these years years later.  More so now, as I know more about what happened (his recollections and my memories) and all the information that is now available about this drug.  Educate yourself about this drug, how it is made.  What it actually is.  This drug causes temporary/permanent mental illness and death. You don’t want it anywhere near your children.

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