[exhausted]

Nearly a year ago i found 60 cans of beer in the recycling. for years my husband has drunk more than what i would have liked, but this was the catalyst. The next 3 months were hell with him lying to me about whether he had brought drink. He would not see anyone so i told him if he did not reduce the alcohol he had to leave. By the August things were so much better. he would have 6 bottles (cans are banned) on sat and the same on sunday. the one problem is that every morning he has a bottle of beer not when he comes home from work but in the morning. Then a couple of weeks ago alarms started to ring and i started to check the garbage etc again. Nothing until 2 days ago when i found 4 cans hidden. I am so exhausted of trying to be a good mum, trying to support my husband, hold down a full time job and be everything else. Typing this i feel so depressed but i have to be strong for my son. He is a lovely man but he has issues with drink. He goes 24hrs without a drink so why one in the morning? he says its a like a security blanket from when he had a panic attack on the way to work. Am i asking to much? maybe i am. If we go out as a family which is not often he would not be able to go without having a drink first which is why i go with my son on my own or with my mum. We do not holiday together anymore because he drinks from morning to dusk, i would rather go on my own.

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