- This topic has 3 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 2 years, 8 months ago by lindyloo.
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February 13, 2022 at 8:45 am #7285kate60Participant
Hi all, I’m so glad I found this forum as I’ve been beating myself up all week. I lost my lovely caring kindest partner last week due to alcohol. I met him 6 years ago a couple of years after losing my husband to a heart attack. At first he hid his drink problem from me but in the last year and a half it took over and depression set in. After several drinking benders, falls injuries and hospital admissions I told him I could take no more . Although I knew in my heart I could never walk away from him I was all he had. I didnt live with him full time only half the week and I know I was beginning to stay with him less and less because his drinking was bringing me down.I begged him to get professional help but he was gone to far to care if he lived or died. The last day I saw him he had fallen and injured himself badly he wouldn’t let me take him to hospital or a doctor , he hadn’t eaten in over a week he was living on vodka. I was mad with him. He said hed sleep and I said I’d call during my lunchtime from work. When I did he was gone. My last words to him where harsh and I’ll never forgive myself. Did I let him down ? Could I have been more forceful with him to get help? I don’t know but it’s too late now and I’m struggling
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February 13, 2022 at 11:50 am #27142unsure2021Participant
Sorry for your loss , there’s nothing more you could have done , you gave him love and support I’m sure he knew this so don’t be hard on yourself x hope you can find some help for yourself to get through this
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February 13, 2022 at 12:08 pm #27145gcrParticipant
Hi Kate, I’m sorry about your loss. I hope you find some peace knowing you couldn’t have done anything to force someone into getting help. We’ve all tried at some point and even if we’ve managed to get them to rehab, it doesn’t mean it will work. They have to truly want to take control of their own lives. Addiction is a terrible disease, it does not discriminate. I’m sure he appreciated your love and help throughout, a lot of people would run at the first mention of addiction. Take care of yourself x
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February 13, 2022 at 3:07 pm #27147lindylooParticipant
Hi Kate 60
I’m so sorry for your loss and to read your story.
Addiction is such a horrible illness, and it is an illness. I’m sure your partner knew that you loved him, and that you did all you could to support him.
You will be in my thoughts and prayers at this difficult time.
Take care of yourself,
Lx ❤️
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