Hi Granvilleey
That sounds so very hard and I’m not surprised that it’s messing with your head!
You sound an incredibly strong person, holding the family together and making life easier for him. However, I imagine the worry must be exhausting and maybe you could do with a bit of support for yourself.
I work for the Icarus Trust a charity that supports people dealing with the addiction of a family member. It is very tough and often lonely so we have a team of experienced trained people and you could be allocated to one of them to talk to if you think it would help.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website http://www.icarustrust.org
All the very best to you.