Hello to everyone in here. I hope you are all doing OK and finding support. My son has just turned 30 and has had a problem with drink and smoking weed since his late teens. It has come to the point that we had to ask him to leave the family home in June last year 2021 He has a decent job so can just about afford his rent and bills although there is little money left. He was trying to save for a deposit before June and had got £4500 however his disrespectful behaviour, shouting at us and continuous drinking here forced our hand and we couldn’t live with him any more. He had not stopped drinking and is now also full of anger and resentment at us especially me it seems. He used his £4500 for moving costs, then when his flatmate who was a friend left (possibly due to the drinking) and my son changed his job I the lent him £4000 to pay his rent between jobs. He now lives in his own and now resents this as well and throws it back at me all the time. I have tried getting him to go to AA, he went to 4 meetings but said it was no good so stopped going. Clearly he is not ready to give up and I know it has to be his decision. I just don’t know how to handle the guilt he makes me feel for “throwing him out” and forcing him to spend his savings and his anger at me that he now owes me £4000! I just want my real son back. How do you all cope please if anyone has any ideas? Thank you and sorry for the long post.