- This topic has 5 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 4 months ago by Floster1976.
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August 6, 2022 at 1:10 am #7614constantlyworriedParticipant
Hi. I am new to this forum and have been dealing with hell for nearly 5 years. My husband wants to kick our son out as our whole life revolves around whatever drugs our son is on and I never know what mood he will be in. I have begged him to stop and get help. I have phoned counsellors and asked him to speak to someone but he won’t engage in this. He works and spends all his pay on drugs and then doesn’t work for months and he will then get a job and once again all the money will be spent on drugs. He steals from us and does drugs in the house. I have spent many nights sat in his bedroom all night to check he is still breathing after he took lots of ketamine and nearly a bottle of Jack Daniels. I found some ketamine and flushed it down the toilet. He went mad, squeezing my arm and telling me he can’t fucking stand me etc. I am wondering how many more years this is going to last. I have distanced myself from all friends and do not speak to anyone about this. Is there anyone out there that have kicked their son out and it has made them turn their life around. I feel that because he is having all his food and washing etc done he doesn’t care about spending all his money on drugs. Anyone who has advice and had to make this decision?
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May 26, 2023 at 7:20 am #35253Caroline0808Participant
Hi, I also have a son and daughter on ketamine, my son lives with his dad my daughter is currently living with me and my partner and it is not easy! Even though we told her no drugs in the house she completely ignores us I find her most nights in her room on it some nights worse than others I’ve experienced a k hole which was terrifying, everyday she says shes stopping then by tea time it seems to appear again, I’ve found empty packets hidden everywhere in her room I check it daily its coming to a crunch time now because we cannot take anymore, yesterday she went to her dads for the day left her bank cards here and put her location on her phone so I could see where she was, to be honest I had no faith in it by 4:30pm she was out by herself behind some shops not far from her dads when I questioned her she turned off her location she lies constantly about it she cannot hold down a job so right now we have no idea how she is even funding it which is very concerning. I have been speaking to my local drug service and its getting to the point we are going to tell her she has to leave, she is 21, it will be the hardest thing for me to do but she pays no attention to anything we say shes taking the constant pi$$ out of us daily. I wonder every day how the hell did we end up with both our children addicted to ketamine! She has serious bladder issues now because of if even seeing a urology specialist has made no difference I cant work out if shes ridiculously stupid or just doesn’t care, at the moment I see no end to this.
Always here to talk….
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May 26, 2023 at 8:00 am #35255LiilleSunshineParticipant
Hi Caroline
We have just had 2 weeks clean of drugs and it was amazing. My son was happier and said how great he felt.
Yesterday he didn’t arrive home from work and his phone was turned off and so it begins again.
He owes me £7k and I’ve told him the debt can clear if he just leaves but of course he won’t… Why would they leave they have it too good at home!
My son sends me photos of him at work, at the gym, in traffic jams etc etc but as soon at the phone goes off I know what is going to happen
Noone can understand what gets in their heads and I just feel there’s no hope.
I now have no money no friends and no life all because my son is a junkie
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May 26, 2023 at 1:12 pm #35257Caroline0808Participant
Between both my son and daughter this last year I have shelled out £26,500 and I am so ashamed of myself we have had the highs with my son not doing it for a bit you think this could be it is it over but then now you just wait for the crash and burn as you know its coming. I am lucky that I have friends I no longer have any savings which I will never forgive myself for it just seems to me that they take no responsibility for their behaviour there is no consequence they assume we will always house them and feed them, my daughter is very verbally abusive if I try to question her I’m now drinking more wine than ever to just get thru some evenings is it horrible to say I hate her being here I hate the atmosphere she brings to our house I hate she does everything we ask her not to do I have really tried with her these past 4 weeks but she listens to nothing she still does exactly what she wants.
I have no idea the thought process they go thru the effects this has had on both of them on their bodies to me is horrific yet there is no incentive there still to stop, the fact my son lost his best friend to an accidental drug overdose 2 years ago has not stopped him I am now at the point I feel I have to admit defeat unless they want to change they wont I’m just not prepared to witness this life they want to lead anymore of have it under my roof. My daughter is going away with her dad on Tuesday for 5 days when she is back I am calling him to talk thru whats been going on I have started writing a daily diary on my laptop of what happens each day I do recommend it because I think when you read it back it makes you realise how bad this is and its something I will be showing my daughter at some point.
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May 26, 2023 at 7:48 pm #35259LiilleSunshineParticipant
<p style=”text-align: left;”>Yes today has been a complete nightmare he’s been taking ketamin most of the day and the abuse towards me has been horrific. He’s paid out around £800 for drugs and drug debts today from his wages. Both of his eyes are blazing black all the blue has gone but then my son has gone also</p>
His best friend died in the most violent way on a kitchen floor a year ago and his other friend died two years ago due to an overdose but still he carries onHe has been on a massive bender since December and there is no end in sight
I’ve now given up and am genuinely past caring now after the terrible day it’s been. He can take all the drugs he wants until either his heart or his bladders explodes
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May 26, 2023 at 11:54 pm #35262Floster1976Participant
Hi, my story unfortunately is the same as everyone’s on here, my son was a bright, caring soul but his ketamine use escalated from recreational use at festivals to daily usage after his best friend died, then lockdown and it all got worse, we sent him to rehab, kept him at his dads away from the dealers with no car etc and monitored his finances, we did everything we could over the 3 years, he’s been in and out of my house, moved in to his own place which he got evicted from ran up countless debts, we bailed him out at every opportunity,. 7 weeks ago my son did ketamine whilst looking after my youngest son at the cinema, that was the last straw for me so he moved out, he had already had plans to move closer to uni and work anyway in a few days so he stayed in a hotel until he could move in, I was so angry with him and I told him your on your own now, I love you but you need to figure this out for yourself. 3 weeks later I get a knock at the door from the police to say he’s passed away, they found him in the shower, he had been there 3 days before his house mates found him, there was 5 bags of ketamine and 1 and a half had been taken. He had severe health issues with his bladder because of this drug and was under the urology department. My life has been torn apart, I’m so heartbroken that the moment I turned my back on him he died, his mental state was like that of a teenager, he was 26 years old, his brain has been seriously affected by this drug, tell your kids my story, this isn’t a joke, this drug can kill you, my son never did any other drugs and never drank alcohol, its destroying young people and the government need to step up!
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