- This topic has 5 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 2 years, 6 months ago by natasha21.
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April 1, 2022 at 9:35 pm #7375unsure2021Participant
I’ve finally hit that stage where I’ve realised the man I fell in love with is gone and the relationship is dead, I’m done taking the emotional/verbal abuse , done forgiving being treated like dirt , done making life easier and happier for him, he doesn’t deserve it , the realisation of he is keeping me around because he needs help boom I give it , he needs someone to give him emotional support yeah I give it , he needs someone to abuse and take all his frustrations regret shame and mood swings out on yeah I took it all , he has no love for me he only needs me to give him everything he needs , whilst I am drained I’ve gave till I have nothing left to give ,so I’m done I’m not giving anymore no matter if he gives me a few nice words because they mean nothing now ,he has destroyed my confidence, trust and broke my heart, but the only person who is losing is him .
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April 2, 2022 at 12:04 am #27764natasha21Participant
I completely get where you are coming from and the worst thing is they will never change, because first they have to admit they have a problem, second they have to do something about it,and that’s too much hard work. Then if they do go cold turkey they have to be strong because cocaine is everywhere. Easier than getting a pizza x
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April 2, 2022 at 1:38 am #27769jamesbParticipant
Hey ladies, as much as I try to often give information from the side of the person who is suffering with addiction. There too must always be a line that you draw to safe guard yourself. No one deserves to live in a hostile environment and I know just how hard it must be for you living with the destruction caused by having a partner who is addicted.
I will always stand up for those who are suffering but those who want to get help and those who have fallen victim to addiction. I would be a fool to think that there too is guys out there who have been offered love and compassion and help but refuse it and continue to use and abuse their partners.
If you feel you are at the point where you have done everything you can and are still being walked all over. Then maybe the answer is to walk away.
The reality of you doing so and the loss of everything that comes with your love for them may finally be the wake up call needed.
If I’m honest as much as I never treated my partner bad, was aggressive or abusive to her, it was just the lying about working late when sat in my car using or the money I would spend and have to hide. It took her to really walk away for me to finally take action. It was the best thing she has ever done for me as it made me realise that just the fact, I provided and was in most ways a great partner to her that it wasn’t acceptable for me to live the way I was.
I hope that kind of makes sense in some way, sending you love and strength
James x
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April 2, 2022 at 3:22 pm #27770natasha21Participant
Hey James, it does completely make sense and I’ve tried to walk away but when there is domestic violence its difficult, also tried all the help what they say is available, they wanted to put me in a refuge and leave my boys with him.no chance.he actually doesn’t think he has a problem apparently im the problem, you know how it goes x
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April 2, 2022 at 9:18 pm #27775mammyessexParticipant
Go figure I’m the problem too with my husband , absolute idiots can’t take any blame how can they want you to leave your son with a domestic abuser ? Have you tried woman’s aid
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April 3, 2022 at 8:52 am #27780natasha21Participant
Yeh they were the ones who said that, I had a case worker.he also went to court 5 years ago for trying to suffocate me, I thought thank god im free, judge let him walk and worst still come home because he’s name was on the tenancy agreement. My life was made hell soon as I saw him because it was my fault and apparently I love drama
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