- This topic has 2 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 2 months ago by icarus-trust.
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July 1, 2017 at 2:54 am #4731eddiebambooParticipant
My now ex girlfriend uses Coke and pills, I didn’t know she used them when we got together, when I found out I expressed my dislike towards drugs. I was disgusted when I found out. I couldn’t help being disgusted by her when she used. She told me she wouldn’t do it around me etc and wouldn’t bring into a situation where it was happening. But I was still worried and hated knowing she was using it. She told me she only done it every now and then, but every time she used I hated it, we had arguments over and over and if it was something she only done every now and then and it meant nothing I couldn’t work out why she continued to use knowing how much I hated it. I loved her she “loved” me. If I did something that the girl I loved hated I would stop! But me asking her to stop turned into me being a controlling manipulative bully. After more and more arguments about her doing it I told her I feel drugs are more important than “us” “a relationship” she told me drugs are nothing she doesn’t need to do them etc and “if you gave me an ultimatum of course I would chose you over drugs” I just didn’t want the girl I love doing something that is dangerous and could mess her up now or later in life. And because she argued and fought me about the drugs it was very visible she had a problem. Eventually I gave her an ultimatum then next time she went out she did them, I broke up with her because she chose them over me there’s nothing else it is what it is. I said if you carry on doing Coke I will leave you. So I left her. She didn’t attempt to fight for me she didn’t try to fix thing she made no effort what so ever, she later went out that night and done more Coke and pills. Since then I have been accused of being a narcissistic controlling bully. I’m trying to manipulate her into the person I want her to be etc. I just didn’t want my girlfriend doing something like Coke and pills and the fact that she defended it so much was worrying. Since then she has continued her drugs use still defending them she slept with someone a week after the break up. I’m 31 years old she was 26. I don’t feel like asked my girlfriend to stop doing Coke is a bad thing or a controlling thing. I’d really appreciate anything you have to say about this cos I’m in bits about this.
Regards
Eddiebamboo -
July 12, 2017 at 3:51 pm #9864game2-0Participant
You should see if she stops and if not just move on from her and get a better life
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August 7, 2017 at 4:48 pm #9883icarus-trustParticipant
Hi,
I’m sorry that you have been made to feel so bad when you were trying to help your girlfriend. The Icarus trust is a charity that supports the friends and families of addicts. If you would like to talk with one of our experienced trained volunteers, who would understand what you are going through, please contact us.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website http://www.icarustrust.org
Good luck.
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