[thinkingaboutthekids]

So just a bit of back ground, when I met my husband 9 years ago he was a heroin user getting clean. Within a year of us being together he was completely clean. It’s been a struggle for him at time and I get that and I’ve supported him through it all. Fast forward to last September and we moved house, and he starts to change, late nights, running out of money, not wanting to do things with our kids etc. I actually thought he was cheating on me, on Christmas Day he spent no more than an hour with us and claimed to be ill. On boxing day when again he was to ‘sick’ to be round us I lost it demanding to know what’s going on, he admitted to using coke…we went to the doctors to get help etc but he couldn’t Care, at least 3 times since then he’s told me he is done with it all etc but we end up back to square one again after going round in circles. I don’t know how to help him and now he has been diagnosed with DTV and the doctors have told him that coke is ridiculously dangerous with it and he doesn’t care. All of our kids are small and I’m terrified he’s going to die. Thank you for reading , I literally have no one I can talk to no one knows about it so I’m totally alone ????

[hox]

You are not alone. There are plenty of us with the same problem. I see the same pattern with my husband, late nights and not wanting to do anything with me. Christmas day was spent being ignored and humiliated in front of people who work for him. Then Christmas night he went out to a friends house where there is plenty of drink and coke. He then spends the day after ill in bed with ‘flu’ etc.

The thing is I can’t do anything about it, he says he doesn’t have an addiction. It is hard to get off coke even if your husband admits to taking it.

I also worry like you about him dying. When he’s out, I think he could be involved in an accident. When he gets home, he locks himself away and tries to sleep it off I hear him gasping for breath and coughing uncontrollably.

When they are on the coke they do not care about anyone or anything else. They can completely change in personality and only feel emotion when they want to or if they have to.

We can only help when they ask for it and let them know we will be there for them . I felt alone too until I found endless support on here.

[Author]

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