[cant-take-no-more]

The man you met isnt the man you are with now…mcat changes people beyond all recognition….Its a vile drug that strips away every part of the person we once knew…….He needs expert help now to support him, saying it and doing it are 2 very different things…my son is getting help as we speak, but I know that its a very hard thing to do and I know he may slip up, and I know he could be addicted for ever more…..one day at a time, but stay strong x

[cant-take-no-more]

Hey concerned mum…..have thought about you, like all the other parents on here……He knows you are there, and deep down he knows you love him…What you are doing is the right thing, and I think you know that already hunni….Parents of addicts are remarkable people, who show remarkable resolve…our health suffers , we live on a knife’s edge and we constantly have that sick feeling in our stomach…..The fact he texted your phone speaks volumns…..he may be coming to realise that you wont be there to bail him out anymore and he is feeling sorry for himself….give him time hun…my son was exactly he same when I stopped enabling him…. sending you a MASSIVE hug xxx

[cant-take-no-more]

Hey John Doe, As a parent, I have been in the same shoes as your parents..Its hard for us to see our kids mess up time and time again. Addiction doesnt just touch the addicted it touches everyone else too……You deserve to lead a clean fullfilled life, you deserves to make those dreams you have come true, and you deserve to be CLEAN…Only you can do that, once your clean the rest will fall in to place with alot of hard work……It all depends on how much you want it!!!!!! Hunni the first step is recognise your problem……Perhaps write mom and dad a letter..They are obviously hurting, but one thing I do know is they love you very much and only want the best for you…..take care hunni, your road will be long one, but I know with time you will get there…have strength and belief in yourself, and seek the help you need xxx

[cant-take-no-more]

Evening hun, I have read your story with tears in my eyes….Many of the young adults who are our children are drinking excessively…along with their choice of drug is seems to go hand in hand….Personally, I have never drunk, never taken drugs, worked hard, tried to show my son right from wrong,..My shy little boy turned into a vulgar lying thief..all his dreams gone , replaced with where he was going to get his next tenner from …..heartbreaking doesnt even come close…he has torn our family apart…no one can trust him, we hide our valuables and NEVER leave him on his own…..The one thing I have learned is that no matter what we do, ultimately it has to be THEIR choice….no matter what we say, it falls on deaf ears….and contrary to the stereo typical public view..alot of these young men and women have loving homes, with parents who would die for them…..now thats the real sad part!!! They simply chose the wrong road…..

[cant-take-no-more]

IF you cant live without him then you are going along for the ride……UNTIL he wants to get help im afraid the walking on egg shells will be a daily routine…..Its hard hun,MCAT is so addictive, its disgusting and far too cheap……people change beyond all recognition, and take you down with them….I really hope he wakes up and smells the coffee, but until he wants to stop its a waiting game….be patient, encourage him to seek help but dont let him hurt you along the way…..big hugs xxx

[cant-take-no-more]

Hey Fiona…..lovely to hear that your son looks a whole lot better and has gained weight……I have been thinking of you alot….and your son…its amazing what they do when influenced by drugs..glad your seeing him, he is still your child at the end of the day…I know its no consolation but when my son was in YO, I could sleep at night cause I knew where he was……sending you massive hugs Fi, and Sue and everyone else who needs the support xxxx will e mail you too xxx

[cant-take-no-more]

Hey Basher, you have so much to think about right now, so where to start….I do know that young teens with attachment disorder have so many things going on…Trust issues, feeling worthless, finding it hard to get close to anyone…that may be your starting point… It does sound like he may be dabbling with some form of drug..could this be to try and fit in???Especially as you say its only when he goes to his friends house…… As he is 15 you are still responsible for him, so I would try and talk with him calmly. THEN get tough. No money, no going round this certain persons house……dont give up on fighting for him, he is so obviously worth it…..please please please stay strong for him and keep instilling that you believe in him and he is worth so much more . Hugs xx

[cant-take-no-more]

Sad and tired..YOU ARE A GOOD MOTHER…..You have stopped enabling him…..thats the biggest gift you can give him right now…..xxxxxx

[cant-take-no-more]

Off to get blood tests then get his medication today….. Im really hoping that even if he goes to prison they will continue with the medication….not sure how it works..Hey Fi..Ive been thinking about you and sad and tired alot…..my stomache is in my mouth, and I really want this to be the start of the rest of his life.. We have never got to this point before……and that is frightening, because I want this to be the start of something positive, but im scared…..Ladies, we love them unconditionally, but hate plays a part in all of this…Most of the time I truly HATE what he does, and what he puts the family through…..I will let you know how things go this week…..sending you love, positivity and massive hugs…stay strong xxx Here for you and if either of you need to talk I am happy to do it via email….luv to all you parents with children addicted

[cant-take-no-more]

Im so proud of you sad and tired….The less help you give him (enabling him) the quicker he will come to realise that he cant sustain his life style….We had another visit from police yesterday looking for him….I told them he didnt live here, and they would know that as he was arrested last weekend…Also told them to stop bothering me, and IF they had checked properly they would find him in court Wednesday. Thats another thing that pees me off…I dont want police at my door. Told him and he said it was about a fight afew months ago..not bothered at all!!!! Im under no illusion he definately will do time, whether for breach or something else….Today we sat in the garden briefly and I told him he had to take what was coming. At 23 nearly 24 he has done nothing with his life, BUT, he has the rest of his life to change things..and be the father he should be to his son. Sad and tired, its a long road, and I HOPE that your son will grow out of it…and grow up!!!! I also wish you well , and I may not be a religious person, but I do pray for our lads…stay positive, be strong and WAIT…… Hugs hunni xxx

[cant-take-no-more]

Im so sad reading this…Sad and tired is right..think of you…IF they both want to live this drug fuelled life , as hard as it is leave them to it….You need to get support from someone….for YOU!!! Both mum and dad need help..but only they can get it if they want it!!!!!xx

[cant-take-no-more]

Hey sad and tired……I know its like living in a bad dream. Dont give up hope, but dont enable him eother…its hard, and the best advice I was ever given is WAIT….Wait for them to come to you…Yes my son tries to manipulate my feelings, but as hard as it is, I ignore his words. Ive had times when I havent heard from my son…days….its part of the addiction……as long as they are doing it they stay away….. Deep down your son knows you love him, and also knows you hate his life….They have no shame, and its disgusting, I hate it when the phone rings and I hate the bad mouth he has become…..Thats drugs and alcohol for you.. Stay strong hunni, you are NOT a terrible mother, but one like so many others that cant make this go away…. My lad is fantastic with his hands..can fix anything, and when he has been working, they all say he is a grafter..but once the drugs and alcohol get hold all that goes out the window……He is coming to stay tonight so I can take him tomorrow, to get the medication to stop him drinking…..then court Wednesday….and IF he doesnt go to jail, then another counselling session…..im tired, not eating properly, and snappy with the rest of the family…but Im his mum, and have to do whatever I can to atleast help him…….I hope he wants it bad enough!

[cant-take-no-more]

Sad and tired, its so bloomin hard, to let them get on with it and not give into them….I was his biggest enabler and when that lightbulb went on I stopped…..He hated me for it, but soon came around to the reality of “mum aint gonna fall for it”…I ve heard all the manipulating stories…..someones after him, someones going to kill him, hes going to kill himself, he owes money, bla bla bla..I just switched off, and removed myself from the situation… Yes I was there when he needed a meal, or wanted to talk, but that was it..Ive been called some terrible things in the past, and no doubt will hear them again……but I know deep in my heart, that this is a by product of the alcohol and drugs…….Im still not under any illusion that he will get through this and come out the other end…and IF he slips up then the counselling I am paying for will stop, until he gets back to it…Im so angry sometimes with the choices he had made I could burst, and the people he associates with are just as bad….Its so sad!!!!!!!!

[cant-take-no-more]

Havent slept all night, my son has been a crying mess….Been ringing round today and on Monday he will be having blood tests done to start a course of medication that stops him drinking..(will know more Monday) He had his first counselling with a private counsellor this afternoon ( after I begged for her to see him) which I am paying for which deals with emotions and getting to the brunt of his problem…She has identified already that he is suffering with severe depression, anxiety a form of mental health issues which she believes stem from the alcohol /drugs..She believes there is a reason why he continues to use them to block out something / life , feeling let down, unloved….I believe I know what it is…the fact his dad was never round, never made him feel truly loved, and when he was around constantly made promises he couldnt keep…..He wrapped his arms round me as we were going to the car, and said he had nothing to say to me other than sorry…..What I will say is she does not want him to get anti depressants, until she sees him again, she believes he can conquer this without substituting one drug for another…And she has asked him to list all the good things in his life and bring it with him in the next session…….I am in awe of him, and the hard road ahead…he is scared, frightened and angry, but hopeful………I just hope when hes back in court they will see this is a man who needs to get help..putting him in prison wont be the answer at this stage, but I trust the judge will do the right thing…If he does go to prison, then I have told him we will put everything on hold, and carry where we left off…None of us are going anywhere…..pray for him, cause he needs all the prayers in the world x
SAD AND TIRED…..Keep the faith and hope…..it can happen to all our kids who have been dragged down by their drink.drug fueled life….You and I have to remain positive….sending you luv n real hope x

[cant-take-no-more]

Hey hunni…come on now, you are nothing but a fabulous mother who loves her son. We have shared your story. felt it, lived it, breathed it….You are a mother at the end of the line…..Dont feel guilty, nobody can do anything now but your son, and in your heart I think you have realised that!!! Stay strong and know we support you, and feel your anxiety…….however we all need to stop enabling them……luv to you hunni xxx

[Author]

Posts