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Hi Lost and Alone,
my name is Donna, i too am married to a man who puts cocaine infront of everything. We have been married 16 years. I love him to pieces, but our life has been nothing but misery. He is not a daily user. He binges. Sometimes for 4/5 days at a time. I will not tolerate that stuff in the house so he goes out with his druggy friends to their flat to take coke. He also frequents pubs. He is selfish and self absorbed. Has hurt me endless amounts of times. Has been to prison 3 times during our marriage. I am still here 16 years later, he has had periods where the use has not been so bad and everything gets good again. Then he slips and he is doing it every week, 3 x a week in straight days. Affecting his job, us, our two boys and our finances. It is an evil drug. I dont understand the allure of it as i dont take it. He has had two affairs and caused me heartache after heartache. Get out, dont stay for your son. My 15 year old hates his father, as he sits and watches what he does to me, week in week out. I am going to blog now so reply to me if you want. Good luck.Hi, and thanks for your comments. My life still goes on in this crazy cycle of addiction and then respite. It is seriously draining, and i feel so depressed. I have no family and dont discuss his behaviour with friends as i find it embarrassing. Most of my friends are nice, respectable people who drink in moderation and dont take drugs, they really wouldnt understand. I really do need to contact the Icarus Trust, i feel i really need support. thanks for your comments, it helps to know that you are not the only person in the world going through this. I always feel like i am the only person with a crazy husband. I am beginning to hate him and wish i could just get away but i have no money or home of my own. The house is in his name and he controls everything. I work part time as the children are still young. I dream about escaping this hell of a life!