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No I’ve done that amount comedown for first few days is horrible. Tonight he will be very very vulnerable if you say them days are correct. Make sure he has multi vitamins and fruit juice today! If he tries starting an argument just tell him you understand how hes feeling but he can do it. I just used to get told to stop being a d*** head all my life.
Cocaine kills your enjoyment in things. I’m starting to enjoy certain things again. Even been watching TV and I never could sit still long enough. I’m over eating like mad but I’m finding satisfaction and remembering stuff I used to enjoy.
Coke basically makes things seem boring or not interesting including sex.
I was snappy yesterday as I was on auto pilot due to tiredness of arguing over the kids for hours on end but I’m refreshed today.
Rule I use now
H hungry
A angry
L lonely
T ired
All them make you vulnerable. Hence why I got a good nights sleep and am on day 17
Listen even me and my wife went down to like once a month in the end but 4 years is a long time. I was selfish aswell didnt try in the bedroom in the end I’ll be honest… I feel like a reborn stallion ????????
Oh I see. Well he gets basically a free pass tonight. Coke stays in 3 to 5 days. That’s why every 3 days is best. Explain to him that he doesn’t have to worry about tonight’s test but future tests hes on thin ground. He will be very very irritable the next few days. Explain that if he disappears lt makes a “drastic” excuse that sounds a bunch of bollony you aren’t stupid. Just make it clear that you aren’t an idiot.
If tonight’s test comes ip negative which by all rights it should be very proud because he clearly is trying.
Regards
Daz
And coke just kills your ssx drive anyway eventually. Notice I’m getting mine back now though not gonna lie ????
I know a kid who died off taking a viagra on coke. It’s a different buzz apparently. Never tried it but apparently it’s dangerous and increases risk of heart attack even more…
I believe a misconception on this forum is what do you do. It always has be kicked out as no one really changes till that happens in my opinion. How long? And is there any working stuff out ever??? I’m coming to the conclusion that I’m actually feeling alot better and happier on my own.. I have too much guilt from my own past and maybe I don’t want to face it??? I’m gonna have too but I dint want too lol
People will get back to you it’s such a difficult situation. Jm a believe of once there is physical abuse it’s gone too far drugs or not. If he wants to see his kids make him earn it through the correct services. He wont change till hes ready and you are not gonna save him no matter what you do. It hurts but if you approach him hes just Gonna do it again I’m sorry. I wish you luck with it.
Yes I cant go back and am realising I dont actually deep down want too. Thankyou for the kind words and support it means alot
I’d suggest doing monday as well. Mix it up though because he will notice patterns of days. Monday morning and even do a night one if hes acting weird. And I’d suggest a third because if you did Monday and Thursday it would leave Friday as the gap. I drink alot of fruit juices not from concentrate. It will help him recovering and also vitamins!!
And the mum within reason doesn’t want it anymore. We have been together 9 years with 4 kids. She has no remorse for addiction what so ever. I’m not gonna sit and plead as I was horrible the past 6 months in the midst of addiction.
Mood swings, calling her names, lies deceit. I even cheated on her once. Then paranoia. Irrational behaviour the list goes on. I never got violent with her but I was sharp with my tongue blaming her for my insecurities. Few weeks ago she wanted me out. She told me she was seeing someone else so I wasnt happy but it was to get me out the house and make me leave. I woulda been homeless so refused and said I’d leave the Monday. (This was Friday night few weeks back) I said can I go out am angry and struggle with emotions just in the respect of how I feel within myself. I raged out and took the car which am not insured on so she rang police to force me out. That was the last day I touched it. I “killed” the old me in that prison cell.
Now obviously she will be working with police mental abuse workers who will help her but theres 2 sides to every story she did enable and also abuse me herself with words but yeah I cabt throw blame around it’s all because of what I out up my nose.
I’m on day 16. It’s a start but I just know I am done with it. She wont ever believe me and she wont get support to understand what it’s like as a user to see our side as well. I cant tell her what to do am not like that. She letting me contact and see the kids etc. Like she said am a good dad and never would stop me. At first I was on bail so couldn’t speak to her or the kids.
Got out that prison cell and was homeless. In 16 days I’ve
Sorted my debts out that I accrued while using put things in place
Living in a hotel council have activated my bidding so should be housed soon
Engaged with drug services over the phone am going in Tuesday to start an action plan.
Been approved for an apprenticeship in september
Sorry it’s so long but yeah I literally had everything lost. The old me died in that cell. I came down in there it was horrible but I’m doing it. Just needed the kick up the ar** I guess.
I would have never changed ever if this didnt happen and that’s my opinion so I don’t resent her. It hurts but its getting alot easier for me now
I hope you find a solution but that’s my insight to my use. Each story’s different
With what you describe cutting contact might be best. I’ve just had pretty much his done to me and it has woke me up. But I dont want to influence your decision as he seriously sounds like he needs help. Wish my wife would of given me the support you have given him. I’m only 16 days clean but I have a long way to go and I see the devastation I have left with my family. My dad had a browse on here yesterday as I recommended it to him. I certainly feel dreadful as most of the patterns of a user are the same.
I read posts and think I can relate to that and that and that.
He will not quit till hes ready and hits home once you have gone that you are serious. With me I’m too late as I’ve lost it all but now im not thinking about what I’ve lost now more about what ive got to look forward too living a clean life.
If you need anything from the eyes of a user drop me a message and goodluck
Now I’m trying to get another family member to do what I’m doing as in going clean and hes wreaking destruction in his own life aswell
If you do this you have to stick to your guns. Use support groups etc as it will be hard and he will try emotionally convince you that hes changed.
It can take 3 to 5 days. I’ve past tests after 3 usually hence why I recommend testing every 3 days. Sunday is always a day I would of got caught as I would of been out friday saturday and Thursday as I used to always crave a mid week coke binge.
Sorry for being late with reply.
The reason I started what I’ve realised is a combination of things.
Diagnosed at the age of 9 with ADHD. When I was 17 I had my tablets taken off me. It’s a good read if you have a look at ADHd cocaine and Ritalin similarities.
I wasnt weaned off them and went straight into cocaine a few months later.
That is my first reason. The second I was always in high pressure sales jobs. Car sales etc. It was a release from the pressure and made me feel good at first. Then it just spiralled and it’s been 10 years until 16 days ago I’ve been on it.
It has took money, jobs also caused me to tell lies and lose friends. It has consumed everything apart from my kids.
I am not prepared to lose my kids I’ve made that conscious and I suppose sub conscious choice that I will not use again. I’m putting support in place as well and have deleted alot of “friends” they wasnt friends they was drug companions/users a bit like I was…
And my final reason is I was selfish. I chose drugs over everything. When your in the midst of addiction though you aren’t the same. My heads clearing up slot but I reckon it has affected my brain but only time will tell.
I’ve been diagnosed as ADHD as an adult now 4 months back. I rang my ADHD worker asking if I can engage in mental heal services maybe CBT and she was like you have your tablets you should be feeling better…. that’s south Yorkshire mental health services for you. But yeah
With the drug tests like I said get the ones with the temperature strip on it
Day 16 today for me being clean. I’m glad you are trying your best to work it out. It will be hard and tough but for me the hardest bit was first couple of days physically. The mental effects kicking in now and reality. Bits of anxiety creeping in and also night sweats and the worst dreams you can imagine. My wife just says it’s my fault and shes not arsed and take takes the mick to be fair she can be nasty. I told her yesterday that I respect her and I will respect her boundaries it’s not a control thing which is what police keep telling her. I see both sides now due to reading this forum. She just replied sounds like you need a mother. So yeah shes very resentful.
I hope he does his best to get off it. Friday and weekends were my triggers but I was on it every day till I I just stopped. I’m now looking into local authority help CGL who reopen monday and will start the CBT process and if I stick to the plan will send me rehab even though am abstaining I need the mental support
Its hard I was made homeless so am living in a hotel. Scared to message her as she using everything against me. All am saying is if you get a chance you take the opportunity. You have to be ready though as the first week the irritability, mood swings, and withdrawals are quite horrible. After that first week it’s like a cloud over your brain starts to clear up and you start seeing things different.
Regards Daz