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Hiya,
I know how you feel, my partner dissapered for a week and in that time I was worried sick, I had my locks changed and took all hes stuff to hes mums. I woke up thismorninf to him knocking on my door. So I opened my bathroom window and asked him what he wanted, he started crying saying he was so sorry and he has messed everything up, and that he had been mixing with homeless people. I was so disgusted with him I just told him to go to hes mums and sort hes life out.
I felt so annoyed as he had no thought for me or hes son in that time he spent away. And clearly the money had run out and that’s why he had returned because he was hoping to just walk in and have a shower and sleep. Hope your ok and keep strong! Xx
Hello, I hope your ok…
I have split with my partner of 7 years due to hes cocaine addiction he also injects. It completely ruined our relationship, for someone that started off as a really nice person soon turnt in to someone I don’t even know. I put up with it and made excuses for hes behaviour and tried to hide hes addiction because I was to shamed to tell people.
But all this was doing for me was bringing me down day in day out. We have a 5 year old son together and it was so unhealthy for it to go on. He was lacking responsibility he was unstable and he just wasn’t being the partner or father that he should have been.
He dissapeared last Monday, he then returned on the Wednesday evening came in, ate food, slept asked me to pick up hes last wages as he had lost both hes jobs. And then on the Thursday morning he dissaperead again and havnt seen or spoken since, he also has no phone. I have made the decision today to not have him in mine or my sons life anymore as it just wasn’t doing any of us no good. I have packed hes things and taken them to hes mums and I am getting my front door locks changed tonight. Yes I feel sad and I’m sure I will have many sad days, but at the end of it I hope for a better future for me and my son.
It is hard to break the cycle but sometimes enough is enough. He wasn’t helping me financially or anything , he was basically abusing my kindness and using me and my house like a doss house. Xx
Hiya,
Thanks for replying,
I havnt been doing so well I am not coping very well, I see him Thursday morning, then nothing up to now, I just keep crying, because I can’t contact him as he has no phone at the moment. Really hope he turns up tonight xx
He says he wants to stop but he just doesn’t have it in him to know where to start. He was clean for 3 months a year ago. But it has just spiralled out of control, and he has disappeared this week. Like you say I shouldn’t worry myself as he clearly isn’t worried about me.
Has your husband returned yet? Or made contact? Do you know where he could be? Xx
I have tried talking with him and just get told to shut up or stop going on.
He has literally caused me so much stress the last week and to not be able to even contact him because he hasn’t hasn’t a phone is driving me insane.
The sad part is we are the ones worrying and talking about them, yet they probably havnt even given us one thought.
Xx
It must be awful for you having to call the police and have him arrested.
My partner hadn’t got like that towards me yet and hope he never would, he gets very loud and moody and stresses out and then usually dissapears.
But I like what you said they wouldn’t be sitting with there drugs wondering how we are feeling, because they are just enjoying getting high and we are completely invisible to them when this is happening.
If he doesn’t show he’s face tonight/tommorow then I will have no choice but to pack hes things, as he clearly had no time or thought for me or hes son. He has been given enough chances.
And it’s usually the case when the drugs/money have run out then they show there face.
I hope you make the right decision but its not easy. We seem to give them 1000 of chances untill eventually we have enough. Xx
I know how you are feeling.
Is he home now? When did he last use drugs?
It’s like they get caught up with the wrong people and untill all supplies run out they will carry on. Its worrying its stressful and you wish they would just come home and sort themselves. But truth is untill they are ready they will just keep abusing it.
My partner disappeared Monday eve and came back Wednesday eve then dissappeard again on Thursday morning. So am now in limbo as to where he actually is. He’s obviously somewhere where the supplies are so he’s happy. He hasn’t got a phone as he said someone nicked it. So I can’t even contact him. It’s good to talk because I’ve been there with my partner many times over many years. Everytime it’s the same he says he will get help and change. But it always goes back to the same thing. X
My partner disappeared for 2 days came back on Wednesday evening, then disappeared Thursday morning again. All the time they have money or someone that is providing them with the fix then they will stay out. When all supplies run out that’s when they show there face again. I have spent most days and nights upset and worried for him to then just stroll through the door and not even explain what he’s been doing or where he has been. I am qt the point now where I am ready to pack hes things up and move on. If he doesn’t show he’s face by tonight then I will do. Like you say we are all.in simular situations and it does help to talk about it on here xx
Hiya,
You have done the right thing by coming on here, because it generally does help when your emotions get the better of you. I don’t understand the difference in drugs personally all I know is my partner of 7 years is addicted to cocaine and has also done other things but where he is so secretive I would never know. He now injects and dissappears for days and I become an emotional wreck. He has been on a binge all week and I was worried sick and he returned Wednesday eve and then disappeared again Thursday morning. He has lost jobs and I know he will return when the money runs out. But its just the stress and strain they cause when high. Does your husband dissappear? It seems to be with these drug users they all follow the same path, no matter what drug.
I’m here for a chat it always helps hope your ok xx
Hiya,
No you are defo not the bad person in this, don’t ever feel that way! Your partner is choosing this life. He is choosing to stay out and get high, he is choosing that over you and he’s children. Drug users are selfish and they no how to manipulate situations to help there needs. They play with our emotions and drain any form of happiness and life from us just so that they can get there next fix. I.find coming on here helps me when my emotions get bad. I am going through the exact same as you so don’t feel alone. I’m here to chat xx
Just having a read through and it seems to be a tough time for alot of us at the moment, and we are all in the same boat.
My partner is on a binge this week with cocaine, could be more I wouldn’t know, but he has disappeared all week, he said he was mugged and they took hes phone, so can’t even contact him. Have been worried sick all while he’s having the time of hes life getting high in some drug den. I find coming on here helps me when my emotions get the better of me. I just wish we could get through to them some how but it seems impossible. And the thing is when they finally re appear they share no remorse or anything. Well my partner doesn’t. He just sleeps for days and then is really moody and snappy and is looking to get hes next fix. Hope your all OK xx
Hello I have just read your post, and to be honest I’m glad you mentioned the fit pack, because I really didn’t have a clue what this was untill my partner of 7 years said he was instead.of now snorting cocaine he was injecting it. To be honest it could be something more than cocaine but where he lies so much I would never know. He has been on a disappearing act for the last week now, only.coming back when the money is drained I’m guessing. I just find the whole thing so stressful, everyday worrying what’s going to happen next. They have no thought for anyone but themselves, yet we are the ones worrying sick over them. They become so secretive and try and pull the wool over our eyes but deep down we know from the slightest change what they are up to. I find talking on here really helps me at the moment especially when struggling with what to do next xx
It’s defo a hard one on your emotions, it definitely is on mine. Well he has disappeared again after getting some money from the firm he works for. Havnt seen him now since Thursday morning about 11am. It’s so selfish & how they think its acceptable to just dissappear for days, he hasn’t even got a phone at the moment, so I can’t even contact him. Not one thought for me or he’s son. I’m guessing when the money runs out that’s when he will decide to come back. But I have decided enough is enough and he either wants to be part of hes sons life or he doesn’t, and if he doesn’t I will be packing hes things. It’s the sheer embarrasment of having hes work boss come to my house asking where he is. They don’t realise how much sh*t they cause they really don’t.
Well I hope you get things sorted for your own sake I find coming on here helps me alot when I’m going through a tough patch. Xx
Hiya,
Just want to say you are not alone. I am going through simular at the moment, my partner of 7 years decided to go on a binge the last few weeks, and returned home thisevening, hasn’t contacted for 2 days, hes phone has been off, I’ve been sorting all the childcare on my own aswell as going to work. Being worried sick to my stomach that he was dead in a gutter somewhere. Nearly reported him missing to the police. Then he comes in tonight and says he was nearly dead as he had some sort of fit and was robbed of hes phone and everything.(funny he still had hes car keys though) he is now currently asleep on the sofa. Doesn’t care about how I have felt over the last few days. Doesnt care how I’ve had to cope. So selfish!!!! Tommorow I have alot of thinking to do about my future. Hope your ok.