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Alcohol addiction was once described to me as being like “a song or tune that gets stuck in you head and plays over and over” (I think we’ve all had that at some point or another) so it doesn’t matter how much you love someone, if that tune keeps playing in your head, there’s nothing you can do to stop it.
I’m sure your husband loved you x
I’m in a similar situation- my husband has poor mental health at the moment and I’ve discovered recently that he’s been drinking in secret every day! I knew he liked a drink and had always drank at home, nights out etc but it’s like he doesn’t know his limits and gets to the point where he becomes argumentative and just basically behaves like an idiot! I feel his mental health has been caused by his need to have a drink. He’s been put on antidepressants about 4 years ago – some days he’ll take them, other days he won’t so hasn’t been getting the benefit from them plus he’s always drank while being on them which counter acts what the tablets are trying to do. New Year’s Eve was the last straw for me -i have threatened to leave so many times if he didn’t change and he would for about a week, but then go back to the same old ways. On New Year’s Eve he got drunk to the point where he was being sick in the car, out the window and all in front of our 9 year old! She was upset and disgusted at his behaviour and the way he was speaking to me. When we got home, he kicked the back gate in, was swearing out in the street and then stormed off across the fields! I couldn’t find him! In the end he came back at 5 am after falling over and sleeping under a tree! A 41 year old dad of 3!! I was so disgusted that he’d behaved like that, so I told him to leave and he went to stay with his mum. He swears he hasn’t had a drink since – which I believe- and he wants a chance to make things right between us. Sadly, with addiction, I’ve learnt that only a crisis situation such as a marriage breakdown, makes a person realise they have to change and get help. Sorry to hear bout your situation- does your husband drink to excess everyday??