[mnon]

I’m sorry you’re going through this. What you need to think about is what’s best for you and your children. If he’s getting other women around and you know he’s been sending them messages then is it worth you fighting for him any longer?

I dont want to influence you as its upto you to make the final decision.

Staying off any kind of drug when you have an addictive personality is really hard and it does give hope that he has done it before he can do it again.

Does he have any councilling, attend any meetings to help himself? Do you access any councilling?

We can’t help our loved ones if we are downing in my own mental distress.

I hope any of this helps?

[mnon]

Hi, sorry its took so long to reply.

We sat down and spoke, set out some rules for our relationship to work, but the rules didn’t last long.

I couldnt stop him using my money because he would just steal my card and storm out if I stopped him.

Long story short, we had an argument yesterday, he kept me awake again and I was supposed to be doing overtime so we had money by end of next week. I lost my rag cause I was so tired (the amount of hours I was doing just so we had pennies was making me really ill and on Thursday on my first proper day off in ages all I did was sleep, I must have slept for about 20 hours on/off) and couldnt find my papers for my cigarettes and he had them last as he used them to make himself joints, the argument got out of hand and he used force on me again (shoved me into a corner of a wall and I fell onto the floor). Weve split again and this time I’m not going back. He knows I’ve got an alcoholic aunt who’s nearly dead because of her alcoholism and one person is enough. I cant stand by and let him use my money which I’ve earned to make him end up like my aunt. I’m gutted we have had to split but I cant take this attitude anymore and the good times are long gone. I just hope this break up makes him finally realise how bad alcohol is destroying everything around him and he finally does something about it.

As for me, I need to finally look after myself and can sort out all the debts I’ve got and start rebuilding my life. My family ain’t proud of the state I’ve got myself into, but they’re supporting me and that’s all I can ask for

[mnon]

Hi, im new to this forum and when i read your story it felt all too familiar with how you are feeling.

I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years and he has drinking problems. Whilst it is a constant uphill battle one of the things which is helping both me and him is being brutally honest with each other about how we feel when certain situations arise (this may feel like a silly statement but for me it got to the point where I was recording him drunk then showing him when sober and he was horrified and got to the point where I got him off drinking vodka). I have felt so lonely trying to encourage him and be there for him but some of the time I feel like I am wasting my breath. The only suggestion I can give is maybe going with him to his gp and seeing what they can do to help. They can refer him to places where he can get help coming off alcohol and give him counciling. Another thing which my boyfriend has only recently started doing is going to AA meetings. That is a massive step for him and he wouldn’t have got there unless the councillor and his gps help on the way. It has taken him a lot to get to this point and he still hasn’t stopped drinking and I can’t see him stopping anytime soon as it’s a very long road still ahead of him. There is nothing more I would love than for there to be this magic cure which takes affect over night.

I hope this helps and stay strong!

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