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Hi Rose. In all honesty if he’s starting to take things out on you and it’s taking a toll on your mental well-being, then I suggest walking away.
Unfortunately an addict can have the best intentions in the world, however the drug craving will always prevail.
Potentially walking away (even temporary without his awareness) may give him the wake up call he needs.
Hi ladies,
I hope you find this of help. I’ve been in a relationship for 5 years with my girlfriend. I had a severe gambling problem and managed to overcome it shortly after getting together. I however turned to cocaine about a year into the relationship and have averaged 2-5 grams a month (not a lot).
She doesn’t know about this and I continue to hide it from her. I never use my problem to belittle or devalue her and always treat her with respect. I’ve also held down a good job.
In my opinion from the way your partner has acted as you’ve detailed, I think it’s completely unacceptable and immature. I truly think if you was to end it (even if you have the attention to get back with him) it may make him wake up and realise he doesn’t want to lose you.
Hi Rose,
I’m recently trying to come to terms that I have an issue with cocaine.
From personal experience I only do small amounts (1-5g) a month depending on cravings.
However I feel like it’s becoming out of control and I hope to confront my partner soon.
The best recipe in my opinion would be for you to talk to him when he’s not high and try to agree to take control of the finances (both wages into a joint account) this way you can track how much he’s doing, it might also make him think twice.
Also he doesn’t hate you, he just loves cocaine more and the cocaine makes him think that you get in the way. That sounds horrible but when you get the craving you don’t think of anything else. However the day after I binge I always resent it and feel guilty, especially on my loved ones.
Hollie, from personal experience. I haven’t told my girlfriend about my problem, I wish I could. If she did know I wouldn’t want her giving me a hard time. The best thing you can do is not to feed their habit, don’t give him any money and try to take control of their finances if you can. My work colleague has a worse habit than myself, and he recently started getting all of his wages paid into a joint account so his partner can track his spending.