[natasha21]

Hey Damon.i could really do with some advice from you please if you read my stories

[natasha21]

Hello lovely, yeh I understand im also in the same boat no bill money (well not enough)hes just horrendous, spent all his money on betting, beer and the obvious, now 5 am in the morning telling me he’s hungry ( never ate last night hes fault not mine) and he has no money because of me again having all his money. Then asking where my wages go? I said not on drinking or up my nose. I’ve got to the point where I don’t care anymore about him sniffing just wish he would sometimes od( I know it sounds awful) but he seems to be getting worse, mood swings ,erratic behaviour, not talking to me.lying etc.i was reading other stories late last night on here they were from 2/3 years ago. It’s just like our hell of a life now.only way is to get out.im convinced too that he’s taking something else too but not sure what! He’s lost loads of weight too but if I mention it he just shouts at me or ignores me.stay strong we are in this together x

[natasha21]

Hello lovely, im ok how are you? He hasn’t spoken to me all day either, he sometimes does this randomly too and it confuses me even more. I took the dog out today and was thinking about it,when I finally escape he will end up dead or in prison. Hows your deadbeat addict today? I noticed last night my husbands nostril is going in really bad.i would like any former addicts to reply too as well please. Stay strong lovely x

[natasha21]

Thank you both for replying, im actually done, im lying here listening to him waffle and argue with himself in bed.its horrendous, I can’t sleep or turn my back in case he does something because he is literally off his face. Got to get out of this marriage for my own sanity,I’ve tried helping hes behond help. Stay strong x

[natasha21]

Hello lovely, yes sorry like the other ladies have said run now, it’s horrendous living with a drug addict, and as awful as it sounds he will be so jealous of your bond with that baby, he will be horrible and blame the baby. Obviously it’s not you or the baby, the problem is him,my husband hates my bond with me and our 4 boys because they talk and love me,obviously I’ve been there for them bringing them up.they don’t even talk to him.very sad really but he has the choice yet he chooses,drinking, gambling and cocaine over us.yes mine is a functioning addict still goes to work but he won’t admit to being an addict, only people on heroin are addicts he says xx

[natasha21]

Hello beautiful, yes suffers paranoi too.he was off work yesterday, stayed in bed for the day, everytime I asked a question I was causing an argument.i always said my life is a best selling book or film,you couldn’t make it up honestly. How can one person cause so much pain and hurt to someone they apparently love. I have unfortunately got to the Stage now where I don’t care if he takes the stuff cause he’s one step to death. He’s here in bed next to me, mumbling in his sleep and breathing heavily.and definitely got bipolar I think x

[natasha21]

Hey,oh definitely narcissistic and gaslighting too.yeh always my fault why he drinks and uses when he feels like it,I’ve said for years then leave I don’t love you anymore after what you have put me through but he won’t go obviously. He wouldn’t cope I literally do everything, do the cleaning, shopping, cooking, gardening, decorating he does nothing apart from work (like me,oh no sorry I don’t work hard like him lol )he came in tonight chewing his gums but he hasn’t done no stuff and he’s (mate) isn’t a dealer, I said I don’t care anymore you will have a massive heart attack not me.stay strong x

[natasha21]

Lol oh my god sounds like my hubby, that can’t be the cocaine surely it must be an underlying mental health problem. Worst thing is he thinks he’s normal lol and I’m off my trolley, he even asks if I have taken drugs ???? hilarious. The stories though, I just call him jackanory now. Stay strong a new day xx

[natasha21]

Hello lovely, first of all please remember none of this is your fault. Yes you are upset about him going and his words but in reality did you really want to be with someone like that long term, you are worth so much more and so are your children.make a list of positives and negatives of being on your own. The positives will be a lot more. Stay safe and strong.

[natasha21]

Hello lovely, how are you today? A new day as they say.Reading through your last reply, yes so many of us men and women going through this.we have to stay strong for our sanity and children, mine as always being moody and violent oh my god and the stories he tells(and actually believes himself) I also think he has other issues but just never been diagnosed. Also hates it when I’m strong and financially stable in a good job,but that’s the losing control. Stay strong beautiful

[natasha21]

Yeh they were the ones who said that, I had a case worker.he also went to court 5 years ago for trying to suffocate me, I thought thank god im free, judge let him walk and worst still come home because he’s name was on the tenancy agreement. My life was made hell soon as I saw him because it was my fault and apparently I love drama

[natasha21]

Hello my lovely, ive no love towards him anymore just hatred,it’s horrendous to think you could possibly feel this to another human being.he blames me for everything, I never know what mood he will be in,ive come to the realisation hes a narcissus and does the whole gaslighting too.i actually used to think I was going crazy. You do need to get out now while you can,I will get out when I’m financially stable. He also is in charge of Money because he’s on so much, he drinks every day, gambles and just lies.cant believe so many of us going through this.stay strong, just smile at him,im always here for you xx

[natasha21]

Hey James, it does completely make sense and I’ve tried to walk away but when there is domestic violence its difficult, also tried all the help what they say is available, they wanted to put me in a refuge and leave my boys with him.no chance.he actually doesn’t think he has a problem apparently im the problem, you know how it goes x

[natasha21]

I completely get where you are coming from and the worst thing is they will never change, because first they have to admit they have a problem, second they have to do something about it,and that’s too much hard work. Then if they do go cold turkey they have to be strong because cocaine is everywhere. Easier than getting a pizza x

[natasha21]

Thank you lovely, that’s the worst part of it all I think, knowing its not my fault. I never made him take his first line, then keep lying and deceiving his family. And still making the choice to take it,unfortunately he thinks it’s normal to do it because so many people do it now. It’s wrong to do it and you hurt so many people

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