[pickles]

I will get in touch with you as feel everything is getting very much on top of me

[pickles]

re taylor: i’m not one to judge anyone far from it i’m not i just know how much you must be hurting and hope he realises before its too late. I expect he has no idea like i didnt, i didnt care i just cared about me why i dont know i dont i only know it wasnt a choice to say yes or no i just became awfully dependant on it when it started as only on a night out then it gets into you such a awful thing it really is i dont wish it upon anyone. If i didnt have children in school i would stand up and talk out loud about this as i no it will only get worse with what they mix it with these days. I really have no idea of any of it as it comes under different names etc nowdays. But it doesnt mean you cant change i have i seriously have and it makes me shudder and worry about my own children. I do get more days where i’m so unhappy and that is purely about relatives etc reminding me and not actually saying well done you how youve changed your life around. That i’m aftaid will never happen too many people in this world are too judgemental.

[pickles]

I have no support at all and deflating day by day as some people ie my parents etc dont seem to want me to forget even after all this time it seems as though i have to pay for my wrongs for the rest of my life. I find with relationships i take pity on them and seem to want to look after them ywt i never get this in return. i have no idea looking forward and cry over the simple things and dwell on the past and the life i completetly threw away. Myself and ex husband are on nice talking terms and i hear through my childrem shes not exactly into kids as has none herself and hope if i prove myself be that person i once was will he come home. ?

[pickles]

I’m not sure what to advise you here only that it isnt right to go off with escorts not only that but diseases too. If this is the type of life hes chasing it wont get better. It starts as now and again but slowly creeps into week nights and days etc. It was only that to be told i wouldnt survive much longer at the amount of weight i had lost and well i ruined my family life my husband eventually left as he turned a blind eye saying he never knew! he did as occassionally he got it in the past. So look after yourself do not accept him going to escorts that is wrong and not fair on you.

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