[rologirl21]

He swears he never put anything in my drink. I just can’t understand how I was positive. Or can the test be rubbish and give false positives.

I’m sick of worrying about it tbh

He’s a good bloke but I think his work gang are totally no good for him. Few of them have lost there wives and are addicted.

When I try to talk he gets very angry and says I’m not talking about it.

If he’s not addictive or really deep down hates it why’s he so angry if I mention it?

The lies and secrecy is what I hate and it just hammers away at any trust I have left now.

Until he turns around and says I do want to stay off it and I need your support I am taking a back step.

How can I help someone who can’t help themselves:(

[rologirl21]

Thank you ???? I am also looking forward to starting my own counselling to get me back.

I have totally lost myself with worrying.

I use to be outgoing, fun to be with. Now I’m just a paranoid mess worrying what he’s upto.

I start my first session on 05th Aug.

Really want to be the person I use to be strong and not putting up with rubbish.

Hopefully chatting here and counselling I’ll find myself x

[rologirl21]

I know ????????????. It makes me feel helpless.

I think he’s been doing it since Sept last year more often.

Before that I’m not sure if it was once blue moon.

Time to look after me from now on hopefully he will realise I’m not interested :/

[rologirl21]

No not at all. I think he’s enjoying doing it. Like he as control and secrecy.

He won’t talk to me about it at all. I had to find Coke bags, straws etc

Then he finally admitted to me but still won’t open up.

I know he got into with the blokes at work cause they all do it. He told me he only tried it to experiment and that he’s not now.

He’s lying to himself.

I don’t think i can help as he won’t let me in :/

[rologirl21]

No not at all. How else would I be positive? I tested him 2 days after he was still positive and I was negative.

4 days later he’s now negative.

I really think he enjoys it. If I bring up the conversation on drugs he gets really angry ????

I just feel helpless I think he’s a binge user and likes doing it

[rologirl21]

Ps I thought it was odd him asking me to do one. Looks like it was planned. I don’t think he put loads in but enough to make me positive (my counsellor opinion) is way of me thinking the test are rubbish.

I’m sick and tired of worrying and nagging. Not gonna get me anywhere that’s why I’m concentrating on me from now on. Time for me to get my life back. X

[rologirl21]

Trust me it’s totally woke me up. I contacted counselling for myself today as I’m constantly worrying about him, what he’s up to etc

I have decided to get help with me becoming strong again and getting my life back.

If he wants to ruin his life that’s upto him. I’m done with trying to help someone that won’t help them self.

Time to be happy with me 🙂

[rologirl21]

Yeah i have these and I make him do salvia one too

I don’t think mine doing it tbh now as I been tracking him (his choice) and testing every 3 days.

I think he wanted to stop before it got addictive and he knew I would not put up with it x

[rologirl21]

How long did it take you to become addicted and what was your reason for starting? Does it make you feel good or bad? As I hear it’s good at first but then it messes with the mind eg anger, paranoia etc

I don’t get why people do it ? Obviously there’s a reason or people wouldn’t:/

[rologirl21]

Hi thanks for your replies?

Which test would they be?

[rologirl21]

Thank you for your reply.

Yes I definitely notice when he’s on it, the sweating, agitated, pupils, blowing nose.

He’s been doing it 7-8 months which makes sense to when we started as our relationship became strained etc

Since posting this he’s not touched it in-fact he’s been the guy I remember nice, helpful and loving.

I been testing him every 3 days and they all been negative.

I think by me finding out was what he wanted. He loves me I know that and agreed to online meeting, fitted a tracker etc

Maybe I caught him at the right time before the addiction took a hold.

He said he joined dating etc when we split while he was on coke I checked all the apps and the dates do tie in.

I’m no angel when we split up so I’m happy to move forward from all that nonsense cause i think when we’re depressed people do look for attention etc

It’s really good your going to the doctors as it’s not fair on you or your partner.

This drug playing with the mind and eventually will take over and until you reach rock bottom it maybe to late.

Your partner will not put up with it she will become more distant and eventually move on from you.

Get her to test you and tell her you need help.

Honestly Is the best policy.

Remember best things in life are FREE x

[rologirl21]

Sorry that should read he don’t socialise after work lol and that he’s not the type to go missing for days. He’s a hard working guy in with the wrong crowd at work

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