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i am so pleased for you. I hope I can get to this point but at the moment the misery goes on. Reading your story has come at a good time for me and has given me the strength to continue to say no xx

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Stay with him, it all sounds promising. You obviously love each other, he now has time to think xxx

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what a shame our sons cant see what they are doing to mums who deep down they love. What they are doing makes them not care about any one else but its not them its the rubbish they are putting into themselves. My son only contacts me when he wants something and its been a shock to him to find out that I now say no to him. I get scared that I wont hear from him so I know how you must feel but I bet he is somewhere with his mates not even caring that someone is worrying about him. stay strong both of you. Cant take no more, this may be a good chance for your son to reflect and decide what he wants, and you know where he is…..theres something to be said for that xxx

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yes and you are doing right, stay strong. I am at this point with my son, we have all been through similar to you. You are not alone…xx

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your mum and dad must be heartbroken, contact them and tell them how ashamed you are of what you are doing and how much you love them. You have to want to be helped before they can help you and I am sure that they will be by your side the minute they know you are ready to accept the help you need. My son stole my jewellery when he was 18 I now understand why he did it and I wish I had pressed charges not because I want to hurt him but maybe if I had he wouldn’t be in the situation he is now. Good luck sweetheart, you have a bright future ahead but kick those substances xxx

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That is sounding very promising, well done to you and your son, little steps but it all helps. You need to be able to see improvements so that you can start to trust again, and that is hard…..xxx

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sounds like he could be dabbling with cannabis, stealing needs a hard line, I let my son get away with stealing from me because I didn’t want to criminalise him (he was a bit older) I should have had him arrested looking back maybe I wouldn’t be going through what I am now if I had.
Who says your son has an attachment disorder, if he was a baby when he came to you, he should have attached to you, an attachment disorder can be rectified and I am sure the love you have shown him over the years will have done that. Don’t let him hear that please. It is easy to blame his birth parents and early start in life but sometimes it is just that kids are experimenting, he is 15 after all and there is a lot of peer pressure. Keep loving him, tell him often and be strong. xxx

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good luck for tomorrow xxx

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thank you xx I am sure they would continue your sons medication. How long has it taken to get to this point for him. I pray we get there as well xxx thinking of you

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yes I know what you mean about police, I have had more police round in the last few months than ever. I am a decent person, so I like to think and find it as difficult as you do to find police on the doorstep. well don you for telling them, they should at least know he is in court…..crazy isn’t it. And no I can understand your son wouldn’t be bothered nor would mine, its what they are used to and they really don’t care that they are dragging us down with them. I feel positive for your son, its looking hopeful, mine is nowhere near wanting to change and it gets to much some times. I don’t feel like a good mum because I am not doing everything I can to help him like I usually do but I know I cant…….xx

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Again you sound very like me, he hasn’t been getting in touch and that worries me but I am trying to leave him, he text today to ask for money when I asked what for he said for electric and ciggies. I told him no so he says he will take out another pay day loan…..I have told him to do what he feels he needs to do, until he wants real help to get over whatever it is he is doing I wont help certainly not with money. Yes I think he knows I love him deep down and one day I hope he will see why I am doing this. I understand you being snappy I am the same, it is stress, keep strong and good luck with court xxxx

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So sorry you are going through this, it shouldn’t be on your shoulders. If your baby brother has been taken then outsiders know how bad the problem is. Have you got grandparents you can turn to and maybe move in with. Although you love your mum, she has to be the one to make that decision to get away from drugs and your dad, sometimes it is difficult for adults to make important decisions even though deep down they know they should. So until that day comes you need to think of you. If you haven’t got family, is there a teacher or youth leader you trust. Please go to someone and ask for help for you. Good luck xx

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do you know I can relate to all of what you have said. Yes I gave in, gave him money, paid his bills. he would ask for money as he owed money to friends which HAD to be paid, owed to work mates which HAD to be paid. Someone would be after him if he didn’t pay money, he would be in real trouble. Now I wont give anything yes like you I am a dreadful mother (so he says) like you I have been verbally abused, told to f off constantly, called a retard, all sorts. But still I am there for him, I know this is not my son and I grieve for the son I have lost and hope that he will come back one day. I hate the people he hangs about with although I don’t really know them, I do know they have encouraged him to get to this point. I haven’t heard from him for a couple of days and am trying not to contact him but I worry where he is and what he is doing. I so hope this ends soon……

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That all sounds so positive, still a long hard road but you have the main thing you need which is your sons acceptance that something is badly going wrong in his life. With that you can move forward. My son who has been out of work for just over a week is staying with a friend and seems to think its one long party at the moment……I am sure this will change and reality will set in eventually but at the moment I feel very angry that everything he had is gone and he doesn’t even care. He doesn’t even care enough to speak to me in a civil manner when all I try to do is for his benefit. I really think I need to just leave him to it and get on with my own life but it is so hard there is always part of you that remembers that this person was once your baby and little boy. Its so hard xx

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That is sounding good, I hope my son reaches the point where he realises he needs help. I will keep my fingers crossed and pray for you and your son. My boy has now lost his job, I have told him not to come home until he is ready to accept the help I am willing to give him to sort his self out. He has been round a couple of times for a shower and a meal but shows no sign of seeing what his life is turning out like. He is in court next month, sometimes I hope they will lock him away just so he has time to think and clear his head. I hope to god we get to the point you are at. Desperate times but it sounds so hopeful. Good luck xxxx

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