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It really is a lonely world, I hadn’t even thought about a forum. It’s actually funny how I came across this forum, I entered in on Google “how to get codeine tablets same day” and this was one of the results. I just felt compelled to click on it and wow I am so glad that I did!
I’ve given in and I gave my GP a ring and left a message with the doctor and they’re going to call me back, I’m going to see if the GP can offer any help at this point, but one thing I’m completely sure of is that I want to beat this.
I’m very aware of the risks at work and it kills me that I try to justify taking them from work, that’s the first thing I want to stop because it’s not the person I know I am, I know it’s the addiction.
It has really really helped me to offload this and finally be 100% honest with someone. I’m too ashamed to tell my mother or my partner, it will change their view of me and that’s the last thing I want.
Amelia28, thank you for the great advice, I shall try that. Unfortunately I don’t have any leave till April, but I don’t want to use that as an excuse to put off any progress. I’ve got immodium thank god! I’m at a point right now though where I’m not at work till Sunday night and my GP won’t give me another prescription, all I’ve got it 4 zapain paills to get me thru (till I can get some from work, which I feel so much shame about)
Hey
This is the first time I’m going to be 100% honest with anyone about my codeine addiction. I’m 26 and I work 12hr shifts at a hospitals A&E department. I work both day and night shifts, sometimes switching between the two in a very short period of time.
I was first given codeine 2 years ago by my GP for undiagnosed hip pain (which still isn’t sorted at all). I started on a low dose and thought nothing of it, then one day when I had severe pain, I took more than normal and you all know what happens after that! Now 2 yrs down the line, I’m taking between 600-800mg a day. It’s got to the point that I’m taking them to stay up for night shifts, taking them to be able to cope with a job I hate and the fact that I’m in a lot of debt that I’ve currently burried my head in the sand about.
I’ve considered suicide many times, the only thing that’s stopped me is knowing that my debt will be left to my mother if I did off myself.
I want to sort out my life, I want to get better. My attendance at work has taken a massive hit, and I’ve become less able to control my temper and attitude both and work and home. I know that to get a new job, I have to improve my attendance and to do that, I have to kick the codeine. I’ve tried to go cold turkey so many times. But even after not taking any codeine for 10 hrs, I’ve got severe diarrhoea, back and muscle pains and complete lack of energy to do absolutely anything.
The worst part of my addiction is yet to come. If I can’t get codeine from my GP, I have taken it from work. I already have anxiety but now I’m anxious that I’m going to get caught or I’ve been caught. I can’t live like this anymore! It’s killing me.
My partner of 3 years knows that there’s something up and I’ve told him about the codeine withdrawal, but he has no idea how much I take, or where I get it sometimes.
I’ve read through this feed and heard some really good points and some really brave stories from some really genuine people. I’m not a bad person, I want to go to uni and get a degree in mental health nursing. I don’t want to give the rest of my life to this addiction.
Does anyone have any advice for a really lonely sufferer?