[spottydog]

Hi again. I’m glad that your time apart has helped you see that his baggage doesn’t have to be yours too. It does sound like is life is a mess and he was in danger of dragging you down with him. And while ever his family enable his behaviour and cover for him he will never change. So good for you! Be strong and hopefully you will move on.

Thank you for the prayers – he’s 7 days alcohol free so far

[spottydog]

Hi, I am so sorry to read this. I too live with an alcoholic partner and a lot of what you’ve wrote rings true with me too. Mine’s on a “giving it up” drive at the moment. It’s been a week so far. This was after he crossed a line last weekend and hit me, something he had never done before. I completely understand the lack of sympathy and that feeling that you love them so much but wonder how much more you can put up with.

I’m here if you need to talk xx

[spottydog]

Hi, I live with an alcoholic, I’ve just joined this forum to try and find help and support too so I don’t have much advice right now, only that someone with an addiction has to want to help themselves first and foremost. That’s really hard because all we want to do is help them and get them sorted, but the desire to do so has to come from them.

My partner has tried to stop so many times before because he knows it’s what I want, not because he wants to do it. It’s now, that he ended hitting me and hurting me that he has decided for himself that the drinking must stop.

I don’t know how you best introduce to you mum that she should stop drinking, but she needs to be led to make the conclusion herself I think. Overwise you are all on a massive roller coaster. I found some useful resources on here that explain the different stages of addiction and recovery and helped me see things differently and how I can work out what stage my partner is at and best support him through that stage.

[spottydog]

Hi, I’m so sorry to read this. I too live with an alcoholic and he is always threatening to leave me. It’s not a great place to be and even more so in your difficult circumstances.

Do you know anyone who knows him who can contact him to say you need to meet up with him and talk things through? He sounding like he’s feeling pretty down on himself – does his alcohol habits cause him to be depressed?

Maybe time apart has given him time to reflect? and it could be true that you don’t deserve the way he is behaving. In my experience of living with an alcoholic though, mine can be quick to say I don’t deserve his poor treatment, but the easier way to fix that for him is to say he’ll leave, than to tackle the alcohol problem.

With the right support that isn’t necessary the only outcome and my partner is now determined that he’ll put things right and is attempting to stop drinking altogether (for the umpteenth time – but is can be a long journey)

I’m not sure any of this is helping you, but at least you know there is someone who has been through similar – there will be many others too. Please don’t feel alone xx

Nic x

[spottydog]

Hi, I can’t really offer any help as I’m in a similar boat to you, struggling with my partner’s addiction to alcohol. I just wanted to say hi, let you know that you’re not alone and that I hope you can find some support here xx

[spottydog]

Thank you Lindyloo, I think just having an outlet where I can share, listen, maybe even help others too will be good for me, and learning how to best support my partner and my children. Learning about the different stages of addiction has been useful.

Thank you xx

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