[sueblue1]

My husband is also in what appears to be his last stages of this disease and also won’t shower, shave, eat, is too weak to walk and only finds the will to get more booze – as his tremors are extreme without it. He needs surgery for cancer and just came out of his last bender for a two week run of being sober just to pick it back up last night. He said he doesn’t want to live life sober. I feel like he just doesn’t want to live having lost so much – his marriage, his relationship with his kids, his license, his work. But he says that’s not the case.

I’m grateful to not have to witness this decline daily but am wracked with fear, anxiety, guilt, anger, sadness and grief for having lost the wonderful man I know him to be before alcohol destroyed him. I am sad to hear of others suffering but am comforted others know exactly what I’m going through.

[sueblue1]

So sorry about your loss. I’m currently separated from my husband of 34 years. He’s been a heavy drinker for at least ten years. He has lost his license to drive, has alcohol neuropathy, looks awful from lack of nutrition, and was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer. I delayed the divorce filing so he can get surgery performed under my insurance and helped him detox this last time which was severe with the tremors and vomiting but he made it through. He stayed sober for two weeks and picked it back up again. This disease is maddening and after all these years, I’m still so angry and disappointed. I feel like I can’t continue to care more for him then he does himself. I have to move forward with the divorce despite his cancer and health insurance needs. But then I’m consumed with guilt.

Thank you all for sharing your stories to help me navigate the most intense negative emotions this awful disease provokes.

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