Fellow mum here, have been on here for about a year after finding out my son had been taking crack, cocaine and heroin. He’s 28 and has been taking drugs since about 14 we think. He hasn’t settled at all in life and has breakdowns every 3/4 months, he also had ADHD diagnosed recently. We’ve been there for him though a lot, his mate committed suicide when he was 19 as he thought there was no way out of heroin. We usually drop everything to find him, usually in a drugs stupor feeling very sorry for himself. He has amassed thousands in debt and has lied and stole from family members including elderly grandparents. We do not love the drugs but we love our son, a lot. Last year was a turning curve for me, when I found out about his heroin and crack I went into the depths of depression and tears and sobbed every day for about a month, it felt like a bereavement and it affected my health and I even had suicide thoughts also. But depression knows when you are down and feeds from negativity – I can see that now and thankfully bought myself back with context and practical thoughts. My son became homeless and asked to live with me, but I said no and this was one of the most difficult things I have ever had to deal with. He was found on the streets busking by his uncle who cleaned him up and gave him a bed, he eventually went to live with his dad and got back on track. Started taking AHD medication that provided stability, got himself a job that he loved. His recovery journey has been very up and down, he relapses every 3 months – we know the signs now. He gets withdrawn, stops talking to me and texting me, and finally asks me for money, usually starting with small amounts, then bigger with blackmailing stories behind them, then desperation. We have created a network of support – his drug support workers, his dad, me his mum, his best mate and grandparents. We all watch out for the signs and jump immediately, otherwise he falls over. When he is off drugs he actually likes life and sees his worth which is really lovely to see. He takes lovely photos of sunsets as if hes just seen them for the first time. He relapsed again over the past 6 weeks, I recognized the signs and patterns of behavior immediately. I’m not desperate anymore, I need to be strong for my son, I have a sort of acceptance of his recovery. I know its very painful for him during this stage. I hope he has learnt coping strategies and learnt not to lose faith, he knows how to get back to life and understand there will be blips. I read this forum and all the stories on this thread give me support in a background way. Thank you. I wish I could offer more support than just sharing my strategy. I don’t know if it’s right or wrong, it’s just my way.
