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Did his mates not even explain he was on drugs? He needs to stay away from everyone to do with drugs.. ive seen.people have breakdowns on cocaine as it sends you really down.. but i dont know what it is.
Sorry lancaster, i missed your post.. 1st off i have a cocaine problem. Im lapsing once a month but i am doing my best to quit.. and know a lot of coping ways..
But what drug is he addicted to? Whats his situation now? Sorry for no1 replying. Feel free to ask.me anything anytime
Whats his situation like now?
Whats his situation now kate? Dont give up on him, theres no greater love than the love for you children. Some people just get in a really bad rut and its so hard to get out of it. I told my mum everything she was crying her eyes out and worrys about me alot.
This is just a suggestion.. but i dnt know how bad he is… what if you tell him to get anger councilling and drug and come back yours and only if he is willing to do it all and want to quit. But i dont know how bad he is at home. So thats up 2 u. Sit him down tell him its breaking u and u dont want to see out bad happen to him.. good luck
He needs to admit he has a problem and seek help. And avoid everyone to do with coke. Delete all there numbers and come off social media, and take up other activities.
Im in the same situation but i dont get my self in debt and you could say i have it under control… well sort of. Im lapsing once a month. And im 4 week clean today.. but he needs to change his lifestlye top to bottom.. and cut out every one to do with drugs. But the main thing is he needs to want it.. and more or less hit rock bottom.
To be honest they are stupid goals and same like ways of dragging it out if you ask me. He needs weekly or daily goals. When he wakes up he needs to tell himself, he is going to stay clean for today and today only.. baby steps.. im trying to quit coke now and im having it once a month and im doing my best to stop. Ive took up reading to keep me busy. Im in the gym twice a day 6 times a week. I bought a safe and my gf locks my phone away sometimes for me if i feel like getting coke..
Are u buying his weed or him?
Does he smoke aswell? I never have smoked.. just was weed. So i always thought i was just addicted to the nicotine.. but ill never know i guess.. but i do think it was the weed i was addicted to.
When i stopped i wanted to go in the army.. so that was my aim.. i had to have a drug test in 8 month.. so my aim was to train and stay clean.. it was hard i lapsed.. but i got a calander and ticked each day off i was clean… i got there in the end.
So.. i think he needs a goal.. something to aim for.. if hes doing 1 week… tell him go for 2 weeks.. and the cravings will get less and less. Tell him to get some new hobbies, and do a day to day plan of something he never does to keep him occupied.. gym…walks.. if hes spending £20 a day.. tell him lets just save it up and take your little boy somewere nice.
Some people just get stuck in a rut, and its hard to get out of it and they get worried whats beyond the wall if you get me. But its all good. They just need to want it and believe in themselfs
Hope your alright.. but all this wont stop until he wants to quit cannabis.. i was having it up until i was 19.. and i hated the stuff in the end..it ruined my education at school, and i still regret it now. And im 36 now.
Id sit him down and ask him does he want to quit? If he does.. then great. And theres lots of ways how to.. Id explain how i did it, but its long and i dont want to type it all out now if he doesnt.
If he doesnt.. then you have one decision to make.. stay with him.. take the shit and financial crap… or leave and start a fresh and have some money for you and your son and eventually meet someone who will make you happy.
If he is not willing to try his best to stop, do you really want to keep putting up with this.??
This sounds simular to me.. im doing my best to quit coke. Ive not had it in 3 week. Im lapsing roughly once a month give or take. I hate the stuff.
But going back to what your bf says… my gf dont really support me.. and sometimes i think she wants me to fail. I ask her take my phone off me every friday so i dont get that. And she never does.. i say ive not had it for a month now.. and she just smiles.. nothing ever your doing well..
But ive never really give her shit.. and if i have its a bit of both if you get me..sometimes she just knows im going to fail because she thinks i will. No support really. But ive accepted that.
Just try and not row and remain calm.. if he starts the rows.. say ill talk to you when you calm down.. and do not raise you voice. Sometimes the coke makes us start arguments in our head.. so its an excuse to get coke.. its the chemicals in your brain wanting cocaine and it manipulates you.
But i also wouldnt be telling him every day your doing well. Once a week.. is enough.
But also help like… he cant have alcohol.. or just keep tabs on him.. but this is all up to you. And just my opinion lol feel free to ask me anything
Whats your wife say??
Just start by taking each day as it comes. Stay soba for today only keep telling your self. And if i was you id do a calender each and for each day.. write some thing down on each day.. for something to do and stick to it.. a long walk.. decorate.. read a book. Gym.. any hobbies..
It does work.. but u also need to delete your dealers num. Change your phone. Delete social media
Are you on it now mate? Im lapsing once a month on coke aswell give or take. Just take babysteps. What are you doing to stop?
Well ive had it for 8 to 10 year on and off.. and 3 month i stopped for at ome point. 2 month this year at the start. So it is possible just to stop. With any drug.. addicts who use for 20 plus years.. just stop and quit so its not impossible.. but.. just make sure he is not having it.. some people get them drug test kits.. why dont u use them on him.
Its everywere cocaine.. i know about 10 people i can get it off and within 10 mins dropped. Its terrible how its spreaded.
Alcohol is the main trigger to go and get coke.. so just be wary at partys and bbqs.. and other places were there is drink. I avoid all these now. But thats up to him and you what you decide to do.
Hope your alright? … i can not think of anything worse than selling coke and having it.. no wonder hes having it all the time. He needs to stop selling it and now if he wants to quit. Im lapsing roughly once a month on coke and i hate the stuff and i am doing my best to quit..
One of the main effect and this is why i want to quit is phycological. Coming down off coke it makes you feel suicidal.. the thoughts that go through my head sometimes are horrendous. Everything is a negative thought, and this is to do with dopamine in the brain.. have you heard of this? And what it does?
I know at least 5 people that was on cocaine when they commited suicide. If i went out this weekend it takes me about 5 days to recover from it.. but i guess everyone is different..
Physically.. well if hes having it everyday his nose can give way.. plus his sex drive with you… but he wants to watch porn.. which is what it does to a few people.
Ive never been to the stage were its everyday im using and i hope i never. But he needs stop now! My cousin and his cousin have both had strokes from it.. both 36 years old.
My advice now.. are you seriously happy?
If you want to stay with him.. bin all his shit right now. Or let him pay who he owes 1st then bin it and tell him your leaving if he doesnt and he gets help straight away.
Its going nowere your relationship.. it sounds like groundhog day everyday with him… i think you need leave and be happy. Its not doing you anygood.
I think he needs rehab with having it neally everyday for 3 year. But this is my advice.. do whats best for you..and no 1 else.. have you any children??
Feel free to ask me anything.